You Know You're From Seattle When… |
You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian All I care about it that it's not Starbucks and doesn't taste like ass You feel guilty throwing an aluminum can in the trash. true You use the words “sun break” and know what it means. who doesn't know what that means? You know more than 10 words to describe a cup of coffee. This is just like the general Washington one, apparently. You know what a dry cappuccino is. How is this different from the last one? You obey all traffic laws EXCEPT “keep right except to pass.” Leave that up to the bus driver. You know at least eight people who work for either Microsoft or Boeing. Not anymore. But I WISH I knew 8 people from Microsoft who wanted to invest in a movie You invite twice as many people as you really want to a party since only half will actually show up. Not exactly. I invite as many people as I want at a party AND only half of them show up You know what Lutefiske is.It's fish, right? You personally know someone from Alaska. I've MET people from Alaska but I don't hang out with any of them You consider floating bridges a pain in the butt, not an engineering marvel. ANY bridge has traffic problems You know how to pronounce “Sequim”, “Puyallup” and “Issaquah.” Yes You have roots in Oregon, Idaho or Montana, but wanted a high paying job. I bet I would be getting paid the same in those places since I don't get paid much You've tried to get a job in Alaska, especially a summer job only. Not in the least You think skiing always means being covered from head to toe, on snow or water. Eh? You know at least three Microsoft burnouts, of which two are millionaires. Again, I wish You use more than 5 words to order a cup of coffee. “I want to order an unleaded, double, short, skinny, wet cappuccino with a shot of Amaretto please.” De Ja Vous A “designer” wardrobe comes from REI, Eddie Bauer, Lands End, and Birkenstock. Ew You consider it a sunny day if the sun is visible at some point of the day. Ha ha. Laugh it up, fuzzball You've been “snow” skiing in the RAIN more than in the snow. I hate skiing When you're discussing rainforests and volcanoes, you're NOT talking about Hawaii. Aight You Remember the Kingdome Yes…sniff You have tried to forget about WTO Not at all. It was a great demonstration of democracy! It's not our fault the fuzz got happy with their night sticks You know how BLUE the skies are here compared to Eastern Washington. ok The guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like Phyllis Diller is really a trans named Eva Destruction that used to play with Hole. Sure Your car insurance costs more because your neighbors don't have any! N/A Your mayor is straight, 1/2 your friends are gay, the man who delivers your mail has a bumper sticker that reads “when they pry it from my cold dead fingers….”, and your Burger World drive thru order taker was a computer millionaire last week. Weak You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Seattle. |
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