Celebrity Snatch

By now you may or may not have seen the pictures of a commando Britney Speares flashing her taco as she's getting out of Paris Hilton's car. Why is celebrity snatch such big news? Who knows. All I know is that I felt compelled to click through even though I already know what a vagina looks like.

PS: It's a picture of a vagina so it's the very definition of Not Safe for Work.


Possibly insensitive observation

If Subway sandwiches are so good for you, how come there are so many overweight people who work at Subway?


Two MySpace memes melded together to make them slightly less lame:

I am listening to…. computer whir.

I talk… in hyperbole.

I love… long weekends.

My best friend… awesome.

I hate it when people… are inconsiderate.

Love is… a good thing.

Marriage is… for everyone who wants it.

Somewhere, someone is… pooping.

I'll always… try to do my best.

I have a secret crush on… half the cast of BSG.

The last time I cried was… whilst watching “The Constant Gardener”.

My cell phone… is a piece of crap.

When I wake up in the morning… Tobe sticks his face in my face.

Before I go to sleep at night… I drink a glass of water.

Right now I am thinking about… what I need to get done today before I leave work.

Babies are… uneducated.

I get on myspace… to find memes.

Today I… will leave work early.

Tonight I will… karaoke!

Tomorrow I will… eat too much.

I really want… a better meme. {{{sigh}}}

Two feelings at the moment?
Sleepy, bored.

Describe where you are right now?
A cubical with a window that overlooks another cubical. My monitor is flanked by large P.C. boxes and hard drives. I have a stack of DVDs in the corner and a stack of papers to my left. The wall pattern looks like airplane seat upholstery. I really need to put some pictures up in here.

The highlight of your week?
Hopefully hasn't happened yet.

Last Movie you watched?
The Chumscrubber. LLAME.

What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
Film art.

Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
Dom's mom. I don't find myself in hospitals much, luckily.

Name a friend whose name starts with “J”

Do you have to work tomorrow?
Nope! And neither do you!

How many houses/apartments have you lived in?
Holy crap. So many. Let's see…18.

Last friend you talked to online?

Who was the last person to text message you?

What did it say?
That he missed me. :)

Where is the last place you went besides your house?
The office.

Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
Patricia Arquette.

If you were working on a pirate ship, what would you say?

Last thing you watched on TV?
King of the Hill.

Have you ever cheated?
On a test? Yes. On a person? No.

Have you ever hit anyone?
Besides fighting with my brother, I slapped my first boyfriend. He was breaking up with me. I was naturally pissed (especially since he was a loser and I should have been breaking up with him). He said I could hit him if it would make me feel better. It didn't though, because it was a pretty weak slap.

Do you swim?
When I can.

Who do you admire?
Friendly Metro drivers.

Do you believe in God?

Do you like art?
If it's actually good, sure.

How much money do you have on you?
$55. I went to the ATM yesterday.

Drunken Photo Album

It's Mark's favorite thing! Links to pictures taken whilst (mostly) drunk.

Here's Mark's visit to the People's Pub.

Here's Saturday's pub crawl.

A response to backlash

So I guess they (wisely) decided to pull the plug on this O.J. thing. Of course, I'm sure they only did it because of negative backlash and not because they realised the error of their ways. I don't really buy the publisher's story that she was only doing it to help other abuse victims. She knew it would boost her career. But she probably realised, in the end, that it would be more of a negative boost than a positive one.

My baby's in the news again

The Stranger hopped on the story about Brugos' mural. I guess they needed to wait until there was some actual contention before they would write about it. It's an informative and (mostly) accurate piece, apart from spelling his name wrong at the end and getting his age wrong as well.

I like the picture too. It's deliberate forced-perspective designed to make Brugos look not hobbit sized next to John's elf stature. Fo real.

What. The. Eff.

I am struggling to find the words for this. How did this idea even come about? Why would OJ write a book like this if he still denies killing her? Is he basically rubbing the fact that he got away with murder in the faces of America? Is it true that ANY press is good press? Regardless, I think this is pretty much the definitive example of mainstream media being evil and shameless.

In theory

You Passed Your Driver's Test

Congratulations, you got 9/10 correct.
You're a good driver – at least, when you want to be.
Are You a Good Driver?

But I can't figure out what I got wrong!

I have no life.

Another movie meme from

My grand total is 163.

(X) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(X) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
(X) Starsky and Hutch
(x) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
(x) Airplane
Total: 9

(x) The Princess Bride
(X) AnchorMan: The Legend of Ron Burgandy
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
(X) Labyrinth
(X) Saw
() Saw II
(X) White Noise
() White Oleander
() Anger Management
(X) 50 First Dates
(X) The Princess Diaries
(X) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total: 9

(X) Scream
(X) Scream 2
(X) Scream 3
() Scary Movie
(X) Scary Movie 2
() Scary Movie 3
() Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
() American Pie 2
() American Wedding
() American Pie Band Camp
Total: 5

(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
() Resident Evil 1
() Resident Evil 2
(X) The Wedding Singer
() Little Black Book
() The Village
() Lilo & Stitch
Total: 5

(x) Finding Nemo
(X) Finding Neverland
(X) Signs
() The Grinch
(X) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
() White Chicks
(X) Butterfly Effect
()13 Going on 30
(X) I, Robot
() Robots
Total: 6

(x) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
(X) Universal Soldier
(X) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(X) Along Came Polly
(X) Deep Impact
(X) KingPin
(X) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
() Meet the Fockers
() Eight Crazy Nights
() Joe Dirt
Total: 9

() A Cinderella Story
() The Terminal
() The Lizzie McGuire Movie
() Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
() Dumber & Dumberer
(X) Final Destination
(X) Final Destination 2
(X) Final Destination 3
(X) Halloween
(X) The Ring
(X) The Ring 2
() Surviving X-MAS
(x) Flubber
Total: 8

(X) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
() Practical Magic
(X) Chicago
() Ghost Ship
(X) From Hell
(X) Hellboy
(X) The Secret Window
() I Am Sam
() The Whole Nine Yards
() The Whole Ten Yards
Total: 5

(X) The Day After Tomorrow
(X) Child's Play
(X) Seed of Chucky
(X) Bride of Chucky
(X) Ten Things I Hate About You
() Just Married
(X) Gothika
(X) Nightmare on Elm Street
(X) Sixteen Candles CLASSIC
() Remember the Titans
() Coach Carter
(X) The Grudge
(x) The Mask
() Son Of The Mask
Total: 10

() Bad Boys 2
(X) Joy Ride
() Lucky Number Slevin
() Ocean's Eleven
() Ocean's Twelve
(X) Identity
() Lone Star
(X) Bedazzled
(X) Predator I
(X) Predator II
(X) The Fog
() Ice Age
() Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
() Curious George
Total: 6

(X) Independence Day
(X) Cujo
() A Bronx Tale
(X) Darkness Falls
(X) Christine
(x) ET
(X) Children of the Corn
() My Bosses Daughter
() Maid in Manhattan
(X) Frailty
(X) War of the Worlds
(X) Rush Hour
() Rush Hour 2
Total: 9

() Best Bet
() How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(X) She's All That
() Calendar Girls
(x) Sideways
(X) Mars Attacks
() Event Horizon
(X) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
(X) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(X) The Terminator 3
Total: 10

(X) X-Men
(X) X2
(X) X3
(x) Spider-Man
(X) Spider-Man 2
(X) Sky High
(X) Jeepers Creepers
(X) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can
(x) the little mermaid
(X) Freaky Friday
() Reign of Fire
() The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
() Cruel Intentions 2
(X) The Hot Chick
() Shrek
() Shrek 2
Total: 13

() Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
(X) Old School
() The Notebook
() K-Pax
() Krippendorf's Tribe
(X) A Walk to Remember
() Ice Castles
(X) Boogeyman
(X) The 40-year-old-virgin
Total: 5

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(X) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(X) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Total: 6

() Love and Basketball
(X) Hostel
(X) Waiting for Guffman
(X) House of 1000 Corpses
(X) Devils Rejects
(X) Elf
(x) Highlander
() Mothman Prophecies
(X) American History X
(x) Three Amigos
Total: 8

(X) The Jacket
(X) Kung Fu Hustle
(X) Shaolin Soccer
(X) Night Watch
(X) Monster
(X) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(X) Shaun Of the Dead
(X) Willard
Total: 9

(X) High Tension
() Club Dread
(X) Hulk
(X) Dawn Of the Dead
(X) Hook
(X) Chronicals Of Narnia The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(X) 28 days later
(x) Orgazmo
() Phantasm
(x) Underworld
Total: 8

(X) Kill Bill vol 1
(X) Kill Bill vol 2
(X) Mortal Kombat
() Wolf Creek
() Kingdom of Heaven
(X) the Hills Have Eyes
() I Spit on Your Grave
(X) The Last House on the Left
(X) Re-Animator
(X) Army of Darkness
Total: 7

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) StarwarsEp. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(X) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
(X) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
(X) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
Total: 8

(x) the Matrix
(X) the Matrix Reloaded
(X) the Matrix Revolutions
() Animatrix
(X) Evil Dead
(X) Evil Dead 2
(X) Team America World Police
(X) Red Dragon
(x) Silence of the Lambs
() Hannibal
Total: 8

The umbrella fiasco continues…

Due to this apocalyptic fucking weather we're having, my trip to the library resulted in me having to buy YET ANOTHER umbrella after the wind ripped my trusty polka dot number to shreds. I briefly mourned the loss of a good umbrella which has served me for over a year (and which I miraculously hadn't lost) before ducking into Bartell to buy another umbrella. I know I still have the one from Portland at home, but this isn't the kind of day in which you can be umbrella-less even for a second. As it is, they only serve to keep parts of you dry. The rest of you is wind-blown.

Let me take this opportunity, too, to mention how incredibly jealous I am of people with naturally curly hair or otherwise natural body to their hair. Seattle in winter is not the place for people with naturally straight, bodiless hair, as anything we do to it in the morning is negated in a matter of minutes. I know it's like this every year in Seattle, and this will be my 10th winter here, but am I the only one who feels like it's SO much darker and miserable this time? Wonder why that is.