NFT Radar: Maximillien in the Market

X-Posted from Not For Tourists.

I’m not an expert on what it means to be French, but I imagine it’s a little bit like Maximilien in the Market. Tucked away down a neon-lit hallway past the famous fish stand, it boasts “All the old world charm of any hide-away in Paris.” Indeed, the low-lighting and white tablecloths feel very French, but the most French thing about it is the wait staff–inattentive, patronizing and uncooperative. Ask a simple question about a menu item, and you get a simple, vague, derisive answer. Still, the breathtaking panoramic view of the Sound and the large outdoor patio make it easy to relax and take the poor service in stride. The food, when it arrives, isn’t half bad either. The French know their cheese and it is incorporated into many of their dishes. But I’d stick with traditional French menu items. If you’re wondering about the “dipping sauces” for the Belgian fries, I’m sorry to inform you that it’s just mayo.

81 Pike St 98101
206-682-7270
http://www.maximilienrestaurant.com

Short Movie Reviews of Late

The Darjeeling Limited:
While I agree that it could have been cut down a wee bit, and was still Wes Anderson Mad Libs, I was moved by the story of 3 brothers trying to reconnect on a train trip across India. The movie was colorful and it made me really want to visit the country. Adrien Brody's nose is bewitching and he also delivered the line that made me choke back tears: “I couldn't save mine.”

No Country For Old Men:
This is a perfect film. Perfectly cast, perfectly acted, perfectly paced, and ended exactly how and when it should. Javier Bardem is a badass. Perhaps moreso with the David Cassidy hair.

Southland Tales:
Richard Kelly's long-anticipated second film feels like a cross between a pretentious student film with Hollywood actors and a movie made by an alien who has never actually seen a movie.

Beowulf:
If this were a drinking game, the only rule you would need is to drink every time someone says “Beowulf”. It might be a neat trick to draw CG over real actors, but I still don't see the point. I'm so tired of hearing about how “hot” Angelina Jolie is in the movie when it's actually just a cartoon VERSION of Angelina Jolie. Just like Ray Winstone is actually a fat old British man. For the most part, it felt like watching the story parts of a video game, but with a moral about how history is written by liars. I'm in favor of that last bit.


He is Beowulf.

28 Weeks Later:
I know this isn't exactly topical, but I watched it last night and it really blew me away. 28 weeks after the outbreak from the first film is “contained”, the mighty U.S. military swoops in to help Britain pick up the pieces. The performances are very realistic and aided in their believability by hand-held cameras and lack of music. My one complaint would be that when there IS music, it's terrible and made-for-TV-esque. Executive producer Danny Boyle sure loves his realistic apocalypse films. There are no heroes or villains. Just people reacting to a horrible situation. In many ways, it is a superior film to the original. Though I did really miss Cillian Murphy.

I Has a Question

Re: the production stills from Indiana Jones and the Pirate's Curse of the Magical Castle or what have you, how did you make 80-year-old Harrison Ford, who normally looks like an ad for erectile dysfunction:

resemble the sexy history teacher/explorer we knew and loved like so:

Maybe this movie won't be so bad after all. Maybe…

PS: Those pants really need tailoring.

It's the right thing to do and the right way to do it.

I just got a fucking jaywalking ticket! At 6th and Lenora! Where there was no traffic or people! By an old Wilford-Brimley-looking fuck on a motorcycle who clearly thought he was teaching a young girl a lesson about not jaywalking when there are NO FUCKING PEOPLE OR CARS ANYWHERE IN SIGHT. When someone did finally walk by, they were nice enough to make a snide comment about the cop keeping us all safe. That was the only thing that made me smile while the fucker was writing me a $56 ticket and not saying a word to me. Oh, I had things I wanted to say. Like where were you when I got punched by that crazy lady on this same block a couple of months ago? And why the FUCK is jaywalking any sort of priority in Seattle, a pedestrian city? But I just kept my mouth shut, took the ticket from him, and crumbled it up into a tiny ball before putting it in my pocket. I'm considering wiping my ass with it too before I mail it in with my check for FIFTY SIX FUCKING DOLLARS for doing something that has no point being illegal.

Jesus fucking christ. I remember when Elyse got a jaywalking ticket, but that was closer to Westlake where there ARE people and TRAFFIC. Belltown at 8:30am is a ghost town. Apart from old cops who should be retired but instead are hassling the kids. Go home and eat your oatmeal, Brimley.

Fun Has an Expiration Date

This just in: The Seattle Fun Forest is no longer fun.

Actually, everyone who lives here already knew that, but it seemed like (much like the monorail) it would remain a neglected, sorry part of Seattle forever. However, it would appear that on Labor Day 2009, the haunted amusement park in Seattle Center is being dismantled. You have a little less than two years to needlessly risk your personal safety on the rickety roller coaster or place your life into the hands of apathetic teenagers on the log ride.

I want dibs on their mini golf course. That colorful burro would look fantastic in our back yard.

Friday Fun Time

MySpace Meme that's almost as interesting as a Mark-scribed one.

*I give you money and send you into the grocery store to pick up 5 items. You can only pick one thing from the following departments. What do you pick?
1. Produce—> Fuji apples
2. Bakery —> Crusty whole grain bread
3. Meat —> Facon or eggs
4. Frozen —> Dijourno Pizza
5. Dry goods —> Grits

*Let's say we're heading out for a weekend getaway. You're only allowed to bring 3 articles of clothing with you. So, what's in your bag?
Assuming I'm allowed to wear a bra, underwear and shoes…
1. Black flowy skirt
2. Black cami
3. Thick hoodie

*If I were to listen in on one of your conversations throughout the workday, what 5 phrases or words would I be most likely to hear?
1. That's bullshit.
2. What the fuck?
3. Unbelievable!
4. He/she said what?!
5. He/she did what?!

*So, what 3 things do you find yourself doing every single day, and if you didn't get to do, you'd probably be in a pretty irritable/bad mood?
1. Some sort of exercise.
2. Caffeine.
3. Shower.

*What are 3 things do you have in your room/house that have been with you for the longest amount of time?
1. Fred, the teddy bear who belonged to my father.
2. My Winnie the Pooh baby blanket.
3. My Catwoman action figure.

*If you were only allowed to listen to 5 albums for the rest of your life, never adding anything else, which 5 could you listen to & be content with?
That would be a nightmare, but for the sake of argument:
1. The Clash – S/T
2. Elliot Smith – XO
3. The Dandy Warhols – Welcome to the Monkey House
4. Built to Spill – There's Nothing Wrong With Love
5. Weezer – Pinkerton

*You're driving down the road, and suddenly you're hit with this sense of road rage. What 3 factors probably contributed to it?
1. Hummer Limo
2. Small woman in an S.U.V.
3. Ignorant Republican bumper sticker

*Sweet, you just scored a whole afternoon to yourself. We're talking a 3 hour block with nobody around. What 5 activities might we find you doing?
1. Smoke/watch terrible movie/TV show
2. Clothing shopping (I hate shopping with other people)
3. Photoshop project
4. DDR marathon
5. Me time

*We're going to the zoo. But, it looks like it could start storming, so it'll have to be a quick visit. What 3 exhibits do we have to get to?
1. Monkeys
2. Elephants
3. Water mammals

*You just scored tickets to the taping of any show of your choice. You can pick between 5, so what are you deciding between?

I'm altering this question to say that the time continuum is at your disposal.
1. Colbert Report
2. The Price is Right with Bob Barker
3. Late World With Zack
4. The Gong Show
5. Conan

*You're hungry for ice cream. I'll give you a triple dipper ice cream cone. What 3 flavors can I pile on for ya?
I don't like mixing ice cream, but for the sake of argument:
1. Green Tea
2. Coconut
3. Vanilla

*Somebody stole your wallet. In order to get it back, you have to name 5 things you know are inside to claim it. So, what's in there?
1. Driver's License
2. Credit Cards
3. Belle and Sebastian Tip Chart (I would want that returned more so than the credit cards)
4. Completed punch card from Beba's Deli all ready to reward me with a free sandwich
5. Receipt from Fat Burger which says the order is for someone named Christ (a perplexingly awesome misspelling of “Chris”)

*You are at a job fair, and asked about what areas in which you are interested in pursuing a career. Let's pretend you have every talent and ability to be whatever you wanted. What 4 careers would be fun for you?
1. Restaurateur
2. Comic Book Artist
3. Band Frontwoman
4. Publisher

*If you could go back and talk to the old you when you were in high school and give yourself advice on 5 things that were going to happen, what would it be?
1. Stay away from suspiciously charming men in college. Especially if they consider themselves “Artists”.
2. Learn to eat normally now. You're not fat and what you're doing to yourself will make it harder to maintain a normal weight later.
3. Start freelance writing on spec ASAP. And schmooze your ass off. Maybe then your writing career will take off before you’re 30. I know you want to make films, and you can do that, but trust me, you won't be able to turn it into a career.
4. Don't go to the Art Institute. You can learn everything they will teach you from a handful of books you can buy on Amazon.
5. Speaking of Amazon, I know you're going to London in a couple of months, but you really should go to that interview and see where it goes, because later on, it will be really REALLY hard to get one.

Best City Market Sign Evar?

From the City Market Sign Blog.