Chuck Klosterman IV is rife with meme fodder. The Klostermeme series features these questions, my answers, my speculations on how Klosterman would answer and an invitation to the reader to answer these questions in the comments!
You begin watching a new television series, and you immediately find yourself strongly relating to one of the supporting characters. You’ve never before experienced a TV character that seems so similar to yourself; this fictional person dresses, behaves, and talks exactly like you. And – slowly, over the course of several episodes – the similarity grows spooky on two separate occasions, the character recounts personal anecdotes that happened in your real life. The actor portraying this character begins mimicking your mannerisms. In at least 3 different episodes, the character’s dialog quotes things that you have said (verbatim) during casual conversation.
You become convinced this is neither coincidence nor mental illness: somehow, this character is being actively based on your life. The show’s writers generally depict the “you” character in a positive manner, but as far as you can tell – you don’t know anyone involved in the show’s production or creation. It’s totally inexplicable.
You have two friends who also watch this show. One of them is certain that your theory is correct and that (somehow) the character is, in fact, based on your life. She tells you to get a lawyer. The second friend concedes that many of the similarities are amazing, but that the whole notion is ridiculous, impossible, and egocentric. He tells you to see a therapist.
How do you respond to this situation? Do you do anything?
My Answer: I wouldn’t do anything. Isn’t identifying with characters one of the reasons people love a show? Sex and the City fans wear t-shirts that declare which character they are most like. The internet is full of “Which [Popular TV Show] Character Are You?” quizzes. I usually don’t identify with (and am often appalled by) characters on shows like Sex and the City and the shows I do love mostly involve fantasy or historical situations (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Battlestar Galactica, Deadwood) which are metaphors for modern life. I think it would be quite refreshing to finally have a character that speaks to me in every possible way. Or maybe I would hate the character. Either way, it would be a pretty entertaining TV show for me. It would also make for great blog fodder.
Klosterman Theory: He would write about it but otherwise do nothing.
Your answers in the comments, puh-leeze!
According to a tip on AICN, Johnny Depp has been 
It hit him in the chest, on the left. He was so close to me that when he fell forward, he landed on me, knocking us both to the ground. I pried him off of me and stood up. But then he came to and started to lift himself up as well. I saw that I had only him him in the shoulder! 
You are offered a Brain Pill. If you swallow this pill, you will become 10% more intelligent than you currently are; you will be more adept at reading comprehension, logic, and critical thinking. However, to all other people you know (and to all future people you meet) you will seem 20% less intelligent. In other words, you will immediately become smarter, but the rest of the world will perceive you as dumber (and there is no way you can ever alter the universality of that perception).
First up is the sad news that dear old John Waters has gone senile and 
You are told by friends and family that – when you were 25 – you (supposedly) became friends with someone you met on the street. You possess numerous photos of you and this person, and everyone in your life insists that this individual was your best friend for over 2 years. You were (allegedly) inseparable. In fact, you find several old letters and emails from this person that vaguely indicate you may have even shared a brief romantic relationship. But something happened between you and this individual when you were 27, and the friendship abruptly ended (and apparently you never told anyone what caused this schism, so it remains a mystery to all). The friend moved away soon after the incident, wholly disappearing from your day-to-day life. But you have no memory of any of this. Within the context of your own mind, this person never even existed. There is tangible proof that you deeply loved this friend, but – whenever you look at their photograph – all you see is a stranger. 
And then there’s Heath. Once the trailers hit, I don’t think anybody doubted that he was going to nail the Joker role. The over-hyped talk of Oscar noms gave me pause. How could it not? It would be so cheap to give him a posthumous Oscar when a comic book film would never be considered for such things under ordinary circumstances. But he was a mean Joker in every sense of the word. He was simultaneously scary and hilarious. He embodied the character full stop. He made someone like the Joker a real-world possibility. He certainly gave Jack Nicholson a run for his money (not that such things are difficult, 
You know what though? The Watchmen trailer didn’t look…that…bad. I know. I couldn’t believe it either. Granted that Billy Corgan soundtrack was pretty atrocious and I couldn’t help but snicker when they billed it as being “from the visionary director of 300“. Visionary? Really? The man knows how to use a green screen and that freeze motion camera effect, I’ll give him that. But so do lots of people in Hollywood. Was 
Effed by the Wind 
