People Puke and Poop Their Pants

At least, according to Ashley on Rock of Love Bus, they do. But I don’t think she was referring to normal adults. She only meant drunk, cartoonish trannies who have made it their life’s goal to follow Bret Michaels around on a bus. Ashley was the first person given a pass this week. Beverly was given the old “bottom 3 warning” for drunkenly kissing Bret’s kind of cute, nameless drummer. (Does anyone know that guy’s name? Bret even referred to him as “my drummer”.)

Bret is only keeping Beverly around because she knows all the words to his shitty songs. She doesn’t have a chance in hell of winning on account of her tendency, even under the influence of alcohol, to make normal human decisions (apart from her decision to leave her 3 (three!!) children to try and date Bret Michaels).

My Mister is convinced that this season of ROLB is brought to you by Ashton Kutcher. In the final episode, he will choose one of the 2 trannies to “rock his world”. And then whichever one it is will pull out their penis and Ashton will come around the corner laughing. At least I hope this is what happens. Because if this show is actually for real, WE ARE ALL DOOMED.

Goodbye, Marcia! We will miss your bruised, tequila infused, Brazilian ass.

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