I started filling in todays meme, a mindless little ditty about movies, when I realised I was bored. So I stopped. Obviously, yesterdays was too abstract for most people, so I tried to find a simple one. But it just sucked. There was no denying it. So I've decided to hold out until I find one that's both interesting and not too challenging. The web if full of meme's but most of them are rubbish. I don't want to be just another site full of rubbish meme's. So sorry if anyone was looking forward to a meme today. (Basically, I'm probably just talking to Elyse here). I'll see if I can find something worthy of our time. And by time, I mean on-the-clock time.
Randomness Meme
Here's 10 questions that have nothing to do with anything or each other. Rawk!
1. An artist paints your portrait while you are engaging in one of your favorite activities…what would you be doing? What would the title of the portrait be? I would be lazing out on the couch watching “Best Week Ever” on VH1. It would be called “Wasted Youth”.
2. You come in a bottle and you have magical properties, what are you? Examples: genie, pancake syrup, etc… What would be on your instruction label? Coming in a bottle gives you magic properties?! Wow! But seriously, I would be HP sauce. Those who consume me (preferably on beans on toast) would become British. My bottle would say “Now with 50% more carbs. Shake well before each use.”
3. You've just been selected as a poster child for a make-believe organization. What is the organization and why have they specifically chosen you? I am the poster child for pretending I'm working when I'm actually filling out memes. It would be the Association for Apathetic Society.
4. “You can fly, you can fly, you can fly”! …and you are NOT Peter Pan! Who or what are you? Richard Branson.
5. If you had a vanity horn on your vehicle (one which plays a song) what song would your horn blow to announce your arrival? Eye of the Tiger.
6. You have the opportunity to make a movie with your favorite star, who would the star be and what would the title and the tag line be? Example: Richard Dreyfuss :: Jaws :: Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water Obviously I would make a movie with Crispin Glover in it. It would be called “Rice Crispy's” and the tagline would be “Crap, snackle and mop”. It would be a documentary wherein I eat brunch with Crispy at Werner Hertzog's house. Jeff Goldblum would also be there.
7. The lead story on the Eleven O'Clock News is about you … what have you done? “Filmmakers Baz Luhrman and M. Night Shlamalalalan have been bludgeoned to death by an unidentified assassin. The only clues to this horrible murder are in a polemic letter left by the assassin at the scene of the crime, wherein the killer claimed the filmmakers films were actually “turds dressed up as christmas presents” and they were “shitting in the mouths of America and calling it a sundae”. The manhunt is on to find the murder of these two beloved artists. We will bring you updates as they arrive.
8. Blue laws are absolutely ridiculous laws that are still in law books across the nation. Example: In Devon, Connecticut, it is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset. Pick something that annoys the heck out of you and write the law against it. It is unlawful to wear those goddamned little “O.C.” frilly skirts that barely cover your ass and make you look sluttier than a drunken Paris Hilton. Especially if you are over 20 or under 18.
9. If you were in the story Alice In Wonderland, what character would you be and why? The dormouse. I like to sleep in teapots.
10. If it did make a sound, what sound would your head make when you shake it? It would make pooping sounds because pooping sounds are funny.
razor blade taxidermists from 014
Whoa. I did Bikram yoga yesterday with Elyse. It's the one where you do it in a heated room. It was my first yoga experience and I think it was a good choice. I also think I did pretty well considering Elyse said that most people don't make it all the way through the first time without big breaks. So maybe I'm not in as horrible shape as I thought. I had two hinderences though. One was my damn boobs. I had trouble doing a few moves cos they were totally in the way. Well, that will be taken care of soon enough. There was also one move that I will probably never be able to do because it involves sitting in my knees in such a way that it puts all my body weight on my knee screws. Ouch. Not gonna happen. But everything else was ok, even though there were several moments in which I was pretty sure I was about to have to give up. But I didn't. I made it through. Obviously, I have a looooooong way to go before I can do all the moves all the way. I'm not terribly limber at the moment. But it's something to work towards. When I got home, I was sore, and very very sweaty. I took a shower. I felt kinda weird. A little light headed. I drank some water and then lay down on the couch to watch some tv. This was around 7:00. Then next thing I knew, it was 8:00 and I had fallen asleep so I decided to go lie down in the bedroom instead and the next thing I knew after that, it was 10:00 so I just resigned myself to bed after that. Today I'm only a little achy all over but it's that great muscle ache that lets me know I was doing something right. Hooray!
I just had my 6 month evaluation here at work. It went fine. I'm doing a good job, etc. But I was hoping for an immediate raise, and I won't get one because there are some stubborn people down there in our Portland office. So I have to start adding on all these responsibilities and do them for a little while so that my boss can say “She's been doing this for a while and doing it well so she needs a raise”. Ugh. We'll see what happens with that I guess.
lunatic gonads over 893
It's been a really great weekend. We had another successful Showgirls party on Friday. The special features ended up being pretty crap. The “film diary” was only 4 days and you couldn't really tell what was going on anyway. Also, the David Schmader commentary was much better live because he could pause the DVD. So he'd just get frustrated and stop talking and then every once in a while you'd just here him laugh or make a sound effect. It was like just having another guy in the room. Which is still kinda cool. And the “Lap Dance Tutorial” was no more informative than a “trailer” at the beginning of a porno. But no matter. The movie is so fantastic that it doesn't need bells and whistles. Hooray for Showgirls!
Last night I saw Anchorman with Faye, Elyse and Gene. Faye and I are really glad we waited so long to see it. It was DEFINITELY not as funny as the previews. However, when it was unfunny, it was still better than the funniest parts of most bad comedies. The unfunny jokes were just kinda weird instead. And weird is something you can respect. The best part about seeing Anchorman, though, was seeing the Seed of Chucky stand-up poster in the lobby. It's cool because where the “Seed's” head is, is a hole so you can stick your head through it and become the seed! Luckily, I had Dom's camera on me, so we all became the Seed of Chucky! What a brilliant promo device! Too bad the movie is probably going to be crap. I'm gonna get Dom to put the pics on OPhoto for you to see but for now you'll just have to use your imagination.
So it's been a pretty great weekend so far, despite my fucked up ailments still persisting. It hurts to swallow, for one thing. And I don't think I have to tell you what kind of problems that would cause (ba-dum, ching!).
Today, at some point, I'm going to do “something active” with Elyse. I haven't decided what yet. It's between swimming (indoor or outdoor) or my first yoga class. I definitely want to try yoga because I really need to start doing something to alleviate the stress in my life. I'm pretty sure that the reason I'm sick all the time is because I let stress get to me. So I'm leaning towards yoga even though swimming sounds like more fun. We shall see though. And now…caffeine!
I caved. And now I am back to being happily unproductive.
There is a movie being made about your life. Cast all the following parts. You can pick any actor or actress dead or alive, young or old. (I am going to make this specific to the people reading this blog to make it more interesting…to me. In your own responses, feel free to change family members and friends to people relevent to you)
1. You? Why? Fat Thora Birch because we are similar looking (or so I’m told). And I already know that she can play dorky.
2. your love interest? Why? Dom would be played by Tobey Maguire because that is funny to me. And then Dominic Monaghan playing himself would show up and fall in love with me and I’d have to let him down easy.
3. your best friend? Why? Faye would be played by young Jane Curtain because they are similar looking and Jane Curtain is witty and funny enough.
4. your enemy? Why? Lucy Liu. Cos she can be pretty damned evil if she wants to be. And also spoiled.
5. other friends? Why? Jacob would be played by his doppleganger on Queer Eye because, duh. Frank would be played by young Elvis. Elyse would be played by Marisa Tomei because she’s Italian (and she would win an oscar for it as well). Gene would be played by James Spader. I’m having a really hard time casting my friends which is weird considering that Faye and I used to sit around and decide who would play our friends in movies all the time. I might come back and add more friends later. Pam: Miranda Otto. Sherrard: Young Paul Simon or Rick Moranis :p
6. family members? Why?
My Mom would be played by Debbie Harry in her current age because they look somewhat similar and I think Debbie could do the crazy.
My dad would be played by Dr. Drew.
My brother would be played by Corey Feldman in his “most traumatic role ever”. Only Faye is going to get that.
My stepmom would be played by Katherine Zeta Jones because Hollywood is like that.
My dad’s mom would be played by that sweet old lady that played Happy’s grandmother in Happy Gilmore because she plays all the nice old ladies in Hollywood (as well as scary old ladies in David Lynch movies).
razor blade taxidermists from 014
I need to work today. I am way behind because of this damn journal. (Not that I'm complaining. I love you, journal! MWAH!) But, since I am now doing both my job and the job of the other girl in this office, I have to get to gettin. So I might not have time to do a meme today. Which makes me sad.
Anyway, time's-a-wastin' so I'll just say this:
I want to watch the American Shaun of the Dead Trailer! I have to wait till I get home! I am both excited and nervous that there is such a huge buzz about the movie here. Excited because if zombie fever catches on, it will make mine and Faye's movie that much easier to make. Nervous because I still have that childish reaction when something I love becomes popular that “I liked it first, you poseurs!”. It's terrible, I know, but part of me justifies it because so many things are ruined by gaining mass appeal (Donnie Darko never would have HAD a “director's cut” if it hadn't gotten so huge).
But childish jealousy aside, Faye and I are placing our treatment right into the hot little hands of Edgar and Simon on the 14th of August and that is ex-fucking-citing no matter how you slice it!
Meme-ories Pt. 3: Suck My Meme!
=====Freshman in College=====
I was still gun shy around people because of high school. So I assumed that everyone would hate me automatically. Therefore, I walked around with a scowl on my face as a “don't fuck with me” defense mechanism, even though I was actually very nice. Therefore, Faye, who lived right down the hall from me in my dorm, was afraid of me. She was further freaked out by the fact that my dysfunctional boyfriend at the time liked to pick fights and yell at me in the hallway in the middle of night. I think a lot of other people were too. A good memory of freshman year would be meeting my friend Kristie at “Passages” and us being anti-social and wandering around talking and makeing fun of other people. Amazing how college is so like high school in a lot of ways.
=====Sophomore in College=====
Hanging out every day and night at “The Halfway House”, where 4 of my friends lived together on campus. Getting high and drinking and crashing and just feeling generally like a part of something. I also met my first long-term boyfriend there and that courtship was pretty fun.
=====Junior in College=====
Living with Kristie in “The Hovel” which was an on-campus “house” converted from a storage shed. They tore it down at the end of the year. Kristie and I would bake brunch every Sunday and invite people over. Skipping class to hang out with Frank. Funny how none of my memories involve academics.
=====Senior in College=====
Once again becoming a part of a group in “Posse House”. Becoming friends with Faye (through a mutual dysfunctional friend), meeting Jacob and various other people, hanging out every day at Posse House. Barry Bauska's classes. Having my first panic attack over graduating (which didn't stop after graduation). Walking around all of Tacoma after graduation with Faye looking at all the places we'd lived whilst there, too many memories to write down. Happy and sad. Someday college will be the same as elemenary school is for me in the sense that I will be able to boil it all down to one or two defining moments. But for now, I think it's all too fresh to do that. Somehow it still bleeds into my every day life. Probably has a lot to do with the fact that I still hang out with college friends.
Other people can add new categories if they want. Like post graduate etc. But I think I'm done for now because this meme is making me sad.
apartment building 2 ballerinas TIME to REFILL Your VAL1UM Prescription .
Last night I attended a birthday party for one of my former co-workers (when I worked at the TV production company). He's a great guy and he's got a cool girlfriend and very nice dog, but I felt kind of guilty for walking around being a little green monster all night. First of all, he has the dream Geek house. The upstairs is presentable and nice; the perfect combination of “adult” furniture with interesting “accent pieces” (who watches too much Queer Eye?). Then, as you head downstairs, the hallways are lined with old movie posters. The stairway opens up into a huge rec room which is fantastic. There's an old arcade game, a red, full-sized pool table, a bizarre japanese slot game, nick-knacks a plenty, and a juke box that plays 45's (great 80's classics!). All over the walls are awesome old movie posters. In the back is a full bar in a retro style. As if that isn't enough, further back in the basement is the TV room which has a huge comfy couch, a giant flat screen TV and every DVD on my Amazon.com wish list. I guess the professional editing gig pays well. So yeah, I'm envious of all that “stuff” which is horribly consumerist of me. But I can get over it. The thing that really burned me was job envy. Another one of my former co-workers showed up, along with 3 new people who were hired after I got the sack. They talked about work all night (as people are wont to do). They complained about the long shoots, of course, and things not going right. But their problems at work consist of guests not saying the right thing on camera or the trebuchet not throwing the piano that's on fire far enough. When I worked at this place, I hated my job because I had THE boss from hell (“Swimming with Sharks” anyone?), but everyone else was great. Here's how bad my boss was: A former employee of his is “The View”'s Lisa Ling. When she was asked who her worst boss was, she named my former boss on television. ANYWAY, my point is this: Even though I was always stressed out at that job, and that boss was horrible to me, even though my current boss is really nice, at least when I worked there I was in the BALLPARK of the kind of work I want to do. Right now I'm about as far away from making movies for a living as you can get. And doing it in my spare time is one thing. But if I ever want to make a career out of it (which I GODDAMNED do!), it's gonna be difficult when I spend nine hours a day here answering the phone and doing useless crap.
No matter. Faye and I are going to get our zombie movie made and we're going to get the hell out of our stupid monkey jobs! YEAH! yeah?
Meme-ories Pt. 2
==SCHOOL AFTER HIGH SCHOOL==
Rediculous. That is way too broad. Especially since I've been to two colleges now. So I'll just say this: I miss school. I miss having very little responsibility and being able to stay up late drinking on a Wednesday and make it to my 8:00am class the next morning with no hangover. I miss Spring Break. Being an adult sucks.
==DESCRIBE TWO MEMORABLE BIRTHDAY PARTIES OF YOURS==
1)My 16th. I smoked my first joint and I made a vow to lose my virginity by the end of the year, which I did.
2)My 21st, of course. I went to The Owl & Thisle, everyone bought me drinks, and I had a fantastic time. Drinking in a bar was every bit as cool as I'd suspected it was.
==DESCRIBE GETTING YOUR DRIVERS’ LICENSE==
Rather anticlimactic, actually. I was a year younger than everyone in my grade so I took driver's ed a year before I could take my test. I got my learner's when I was 16 and my parents told me that I wouldn't be able to take the car out by myself till my senior year anyway, so I figured there was no point getting my license till then. So I was 17 when I got my license and everyone else had been driving for 2 years. Turns out I'm a terrible driver anyway so now I do it as little as possible
==EVER DONE ANYTHING CRAZY TO GET YOUR CRUSH’S ATTENTION? IF SO, WHAT?==
I was dropping hints like crazy to this guy in college. I had just broken up with a boyfriend of two years (and by “just broken up” I mean it was several months later and I had finally been able to stop crying long enough to try and find a rebound. I found one in this silly little freshman, thinking it would be pretty easy. I just wanted to make out with him a few times and be done with it. Well, my hinting was fruitless, so finally, I just told everyone I knew to tell him that if he wanted, I would make out with him, no strings. He started flirting with me all the time but STILL nothing ever happened and he avoided all situations in which we could be alone together. So I gave up. Just about that time, my senior year was almost over and he came to a graduation party at my friend's house. After everyone was asleep, and we were lying on the couch, he made his move. It was a horrible disaster and was over in 10 minutes (I might be being liberal with the time). Luckily, I never really had to see him again after that. Worst. Rebound. Ever.
==DESCRIBE A FUN VACATION YOU’VE TAKEN==
Just had a blast in Eastern Washington at the Stabbin' Cabbin. See previous journal entry.
==WHAT CITIES HAVE YOU LIVED IN?==
Dallas, TX (baby), Beaverton, OR (2-4), Huntsville, AL (4-8), Flower Mount, TX (8), Richmond, VA (9-17), Tacoma, WA (17-22), London, UK (22), Seattle, WA (23-present).
==HOW DID YOU MEET ALL YOUR FRIENDS?==
Mostly through college or through film projects. Come on, you all know how I met you guys.
==ACTIVITIES==
Yes.
==FIRST KISS==
My first organized kiss was playing spin the bottle at Hippie Camp. I was 14. His name was Daniel. He liked my friend. A few days later, a 13 year old named Robbie kissed me on his own accord after the square dance. He later gave me poison ivy.
==JOBS==
Jesus. This won't be fun for anyone to read so I'll try to keep in breif. I babysat in high school. I worked at a B&B my freshman year of college. I worked for food services in college. I tempted at a billion places after college, including whilst in London, I worked for 5 minutes at a TV production company in Seattle that makes stupid reality shows. Then I got the sack and now I work in my present version of hell.
I liked part 1 of this a lot better.
scooby snack 5 curses
My weird cold has mutated once again. Now my throat doesn’t hurt at all, really, but I’m up all night coughing. This morning I woke up and one of my eyes was crusted shut and when I opened it, it was all bloodshot. Gross, I know. I’m not sure how many more incarnations this thing is going to take before it decides to finally leave me.
I am not happy about being here at work either. Yesterday, after lunch, everyone (led by the tiniest little dictator) began to scrutinize my workspace once again. Now, I am the receptionist so my desk is just hanging out there for everyone to see. However, it is not a proper reception desk, and is, in fact, the smallest, crappiest desk in the office. Therefore, it doesn’t look very nice when a client walks in. The notion of us being able to BUY a new desk is unlikely because we have a hard enough time just getting the budgeting people (in Portland) to let us have an extra chair for the conference room. So instead, everyone was trying to figure out “free” solutions to making my area better. ‘Lil Dictator said “Why don’t we take all this stuff and move it to the table behind you?” She was gesturing towards all the papers and files on my desk that are my WORK. “Because that’s my WORK,” says I. “Oh, well, what if we put it all on a credenza over in that corner?” Is she serious? “Because that’s my WORK and I still need to be able to answer the phone and greet clients,” says I. “Oh.” After they moved the candy dish, put my garbage can in the corner far away from me, re-arranged my files and and tried to get me to move my computer monitor to about 2 inches away from my face, they decided that one of them should swap desks with me since no one ever sees THIER desks. But of course, no one WANTED to swap because then they would have the smaller, crappier desk. So they argued amongst themselves for a while, still standing right next to me so I wasn’t getting any work done. Finally, they decided that one of them would switch with me and then they would switch amongst each other and then everyone would be marginally happy. But who will do the moving. I bet it will be me, the ass monkey. This whole process took about 2 and a half hours in which no one was doing any actual work. What will today have in store. I can’t wait to find out.
Effed by the Wind 