Five questions meme. Here's how it works:

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Thanks ! This is a truly original and fun meme and definitely beats the hell out of a myspace survey.

Marks questions and my answers follow:

1. What three things does Richmond, Virginia have over Seattle, Washington?

A) The fact that you can order grits and sweet tea in pretty much every restaurant that’s not ethnic. Of course, this is only an advantage if you like these things.
B) Its proximity to a sandy, warm beach.
c) History is all around you. I didn’t really appreciate this when I was a kid going on field trips, but looking back, it was pretty neat to be able to see where Thomas Jefferson lived, to visit Williamsburg, and best of all, to be able to walk past buildings that were several hundred years old on a regular basis. Pioneer Square is the only real historical area in Seattle, and it’s overrun by frat boys and derelicts.

2. Would you be willing to eat one 16 ounce steak every day for a year if it meant you'd get full funding and wide theatrical distribution for your first feature film?

This is obviously tough for me for two reasons. The first is, of course, my moral objections to eating meat and the second is what such a diet would do to my health. In the first instance, since such an opportunity would positively affect the careers of not only me but my friends and colleagues, I would certainly consider putting aside my personal beliefs temporarily to make us all happy in the long run. However, in the second instance, if I died young of a heart-attack, I would not live to enjoy the spoils of a successful film. So I suppose my answer is thus: Provided I had this deal in writing, I would give it at try, but ask that if I found my health ailing, that I could either quit, or transfer the task to Faye.

3. If you had to be a contestant on a nationally televised reality TV show – in which you'd have to earnestly participate, not goof around – which one would you choose?

This is difficult because I am not at all qualified to be on any of the reality shows that I enjoy watching. I’m way too fat to be on America’s Next Top Model. I’m not formerly famous enough to be on the Surreal Life. I’m not ditzy OR geeky enough to be on Beauty and the Geek. If I could find a way to make myself fit, I would choose to be on Supergroup. Does Scott Ian need a personal assistant?

I apologize if this didn’t satisfactorily answer the question. Maybe there are more reality shows for non-famous, non-bachelorette people that I am not aware of.

4. What, in your opinion, is the worst thing about women in general (in terms of behavior, personality, etc. – not a physical trait)?

The fact that every single woman on the planet, with the possible exception of Paris Hilton, has honestly, and usually erroneously, thought she was fat. Of course I am guilty of this myself.

5. Would you rather go to jail for 10 years for a crime that all your friends and loved ones knew you didn't commit, or go to jail for 2 years for a crime you DID commit and which horrified all your friends and loved ones?

The first one.

July 13, 2006
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

Redundant/inane questions removed for the reader’s benefit. Overall, however, this was one of the better ones.

1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
Usually open because they are so full of crap that I can’t close them.

2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?
Yes. And then I never use them.

3. Have you ever 'done it' in a hotel room?
One of the best things TO do in a hotel room.

4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
No. But I have stolen a traffic cone.

5. Do you like to use post-it notes?
Oh yes.

6. Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
I occasionally use coupons from the Val-Pak but the ones I get from Safeway go right in the garbage.

7. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
Bear. I’d like to think some innate Beastmaster shit might kick in and the bear would become my friend.

9. Do you always smile for pictures?
I certainly try. Unless it’s a “theme” picture, in which case the theme dictates the expression. I’m not terribly photogenic though and my forced smiles often do unfortunate things to my face.

11. Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?
I don’t use a top sheet. It always ends up bunched at the bottom of my bed. I’m a sleep kicker, apparently.

12. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
No. I’m not THAT OCD.

13. Do you like candles?
They’re pretty, but I mostly use them to eliminate odors.

14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
What do I look like, a hippie? Don’t answer that.

15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?
Nope. Just my fingers.

16. Do you go swimming a lot?
There really isn’t a convenient place to swim around here. But I certainly enjoy it when it’s possible.

17. Do you like popcorn from those big tins?
Hell yes.

19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Sure. But it’s important to remember that it’s not everyone’s color.

20. Do you still watch cartoons?
Not the Saturday morning variety, but there are plenty of cartoons for adults these days. And I will always love the Transformers.

21. What’s your favorite scary movie?
Rosemary’s Baby.

22. Where would you bury treasure if you had some?
Center of the Earth.

23. What do you drink with dinner?
Water and sometimes booze.

24. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Honey and/or mustard.

25. What is your favorite food/cuisine?
Indian.

26. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Back to the Future, Zoolander, The Jerk, Billy Madison, Out Cold…countless others.

27. Last person you kissed/kissed you?
B.

28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
Brownie. It was LLame. I ALWAYS sold the most cookies though.

29. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
For the right price. Assuming any current magazine would even be interested in my body type.

30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
I used to write letters all the time. It’s not as much fun if people don’t write you back so I’m all email these days. I think the last letter I wrote must have been from the UK.

31. Can you change the oil on a car?
I’m sure I COULD. I’ve heard it’s not difficult.

32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Nope. I got pulled over once but my boobies talked my way out of it.

33. Ran out of gas?
Not yet.

34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
I couldn’t POSSIBLY choose. The sandwich is a beautiful and diverse creature.

35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
Anything involving eggs and potatoes.

38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
I can’t remember everything but I seem to recall Wonder Woman (several times…I just wore my underoos and a mask), a Hershey Kiss, a television set and the Statue of Liberty.

41. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Harpers and Astonishing X-Men (if that counts).

42.Which are better Legos or Lincoln Logs?
No contest. Did LINCOLN have a SPACE version of his logs? I think not.

43. Are you stubborn?
Only when schedules are involved. Otherwise, not so much.

45. Ever watch soap operas?
I’ve had my periods. There was a Days of Our Lives (Jensen Ackles!) period in college. And you can’t live in the UK without getting sucked into Eastenders and Emmerdale.

46. Afraid of heights?
No. Just elevators plummeting from them.

47. Sing in the car?
If I’m riding with someone I know well.

48. Dance in the shower?
That’s dangerous!

49. Dance in the car?
Does head-bobbing count?

50. Ever used a gun?
Never.

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
Two years ago we had pictures taken in my office for our website.

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Some of them. But those are usually the most enjoyable ones.

53. Is Christmas stressful?
Not anymore. It certainly was when I lived with my family. It’s taken me several good Christmases with friends to not HATE the holiday.

54. Ever eat a pierogie?
Sure.

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
Apple’s a classic.

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Undercover cop (21 Jump Street), zoo vet, filmmaker

57. Do you believe in ghosts?
Sometimes.

58. Ever have Deja-vu?
Of course.

59. Take a vitamin daily?
Yes.

60. Wear slippers?
Pink mice.

61. Wear a bath robe?
Sometimes.

69. Ever take dance lessons?
When I was a kid I took “jazz tap” and was even in a recital. I was, of course, a terrible spazz and didn’t stick with it.

71. Can you curl your tongue?
Nope. Recessive gene.

72. Ever won a spelling bee?
Good LORD no. Before spell check, my writing was embarrassing.

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
Yes.

74. Own any record albums?
C is for Cookie and various 45’s. I gave the rest of my records to Dom because I don’t have a record player and I’m too lazy to buy a new one.

75. Own a record player?
See above.

76. Regularly burn incense?
No. In fact, some incense gives me hives.

78. Who would you like to see in concert?
I’ve pretty much seen everyone alive that I’d like to see.

79. What was your last concert you saw?
Twilight Singers.

80. Hot tea or cold tea?
Hot. But you can’t beat a cold sweet tea. I just wish someone in Washington knew how to make it.

81. Tea or coffee?
Tea.

82. Favorite kind of cookie?
Oatmeal with either chocolate chips or raisins.

83. Can you swim well?
Not WELL.

84. Can you hold your breath w/o manually holding your nose?
Yes.

85. Are you patient?
Heh. Not especially.

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?
DJ. If you don’t like the band, you’re stuck with them for the rest of the night.

90. Can you knit or crochet?
No. But it’s pretty hot right now among girls my age.

91. Best room for a fireplace?
The living room. I would REALLY love a fireplace.

94. Who was your HS crush?
Michael Cross. And how.

95. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?
I’m actually not 4 years old.

98. Whats your favorite color?
Red

July 11, 2006
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

Another random-number-of-questions meme.

Is anyone else having an EXTREMELY difficult time concentrating on work this week?

1)How old do you wish you were?
25 forever.

2)Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Getting ready for work. Meep called me from Wenatchee and told me to turn on the TV..

3) What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Swear, hit the machine a few times and then, if there’s no one around, just wander off hungry and disappointed. If there’s someone to try and get a refund from, however, I will definitely do that.

4) Do you consider yourself kind?
Sure.

5) If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
Done.

6) If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Italian.

7) Do you know your neighbors?
Not yet. I am intimately acquainted with their footsteps, however.

8)What do you consider a vacation?
Any day when I don’t have to come to work.

9) Do you follow your horoscope?
Nope.

10) Would you move for the person you love(d)?
It really all depends. There are many places I WOULDN’T move though.

11) Are you touchy feely?
I CAN be. I can also NOT be.

12) Do you believe that opposites attract?
In a way. It’s not quite that simple though.

13) Dream job?
Eli Roth.

14) Favorite channel(s)?
Comedy Central, VH1, Sci-Fi, FX, Animal Planet, Bravo

15) Favorite place to go on weekends?
Bed.

16) Showers or Baths?
Shower.

17) Do you paint your nails?
Very rarely. But it happens.

18) Do you trust people easily?
I like to think that I can, yes. But certain types of people instill suspicion in me.

19) What are your phobias?
Elevators, strangulation.

20) Do you want kids?
Not unless something in me changes.

21) Do you keep a handwritten journal?
I have several from my past but I haven’t opened them in a long time. The blog has replaced them. Which is good because I am a lot less tempted to write embarrassing stuff in my blog.

22) Where would you rather be right now?
Outside.

23) Who makes you feel warm and fuzzy?
Tobe.

24) Heavy or light sleep?
Light unless I’m drunk.

25) Are you paranoid?
Yeah.

26) Are you impatient?
Yep.

27) Who can you relate to?
Rob Gordon and Lenore.

28) How do you feel about interracial couples?
Same as I feel about any couple, really.

29) Have you been burned by love?
As a 27-year-old human, I have to answer yes.

30) What's your life motto?
Be nice. Everybody has bad days.

31) What's your main ringtone on your mobile?
Shpadoinkle Day.

32) What were you doing at midnight last night?
Trying to fall asleep.

33) Who was your last text message from?
Sherwood.

34) Who's bed did you sleep in last night?
Mine.

35) What color shirt are you wearing?
Black.

37) Name three things you have on you at all times?
phone, chap stick, wallet

38.) What color are your bed sheets?
Red.

39) How much cash do you have on you right now?
$52

40) What is your favorite part of the chicken?
The cuddly part.

41) What's your favorite town/city?
SeaTown.

42) I can't wait till:?
The weekend!

43) Who got you to join myspace?
Frank.

44) What did you have for dinner last night?
Leftover pasta.

45) How tall are you barefoot?
5 foot nuthin’

46) Have you ever smoked heroin?
Sort of.

47) Do you own a gun?
Only the toy version.

48) What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Water and tea.

49) What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Vag.

50) Do you have A.D.D.?
I’m sorry, what?

51) What time did you wake up today?
6:45

52) Current worry?
Numerous.

53) Current hate?
Uniformed judgments.

54) Favorite place to be?
Under a warm, shining sun.

55) Where would you like to travel?
Anywhere I haven’t yet been, really. With few exceptions, mostly involving the Midwestern United States.

56) Where do you think you'll be in 10 yrs?
Too scary to think about. But I know where I HOPE I’ll be.

57) last thing you ate?
Toast.

58) What songs do you sing in the shower?
Whatever is in my head at the moment.

59) Last person that made you laugh?
My boss.

60) Worst injury you've ever had?
My knees are a perpetual injury so I guess that’s pretty bad.

61) Does someone have a crush on you?
Hope so.

62) What is your favorite candy?
Cadbury Cream Eggs.

63) What song do you want played at your funeral?
Some good Irish drinking songs.

May 31, 2006
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

10 short questions for a gloomy Thursday.

1) If you could only repent for one thing when you die, what one thing would you choose?
If it turned out I had to repent, I suppose, I would repent for not believing in repentance. Sorry, God. My bad.

2) If you could talk to anyone in the world by phone, who would you choose?
They don’t have an email address? Then I don’t need to talk to them.

3) If, like the milk or the newspaper, you could have anything delivered to your front doorstep each and every day, what would it be?
Chai.

4) If you could have your voice sound like any other person, living or alive, who would that be and why?
Living OR alive? Such a broad spectrum. If we’re talking singing voice, Kim Shattuck from the Muffs. Speaking voice: Cate Blanchette.

5) Which month of the year do you think best describes your personality?
While I don’t particularly subscribe to astrology, I am 100% a Virgo type personality and therefore I shall choose September.

6) If you could make $100 a day by avoiding physical contact of any kind with another human being, how much money do you think you’d be able to make before you cracked?
$200 tops.

7) How much do the words “I love you” mean to you? Do you throw the word “love” around a lot? For example, if someone made a hilarious comment, might you exclaim “I love you!” while laughing, or are those words more sacred?
Your phrasing is strange but I see what you’re getting at. I do not throw the words around, no. But hyperbole is often unavoidable. For instance: “I LOVE the Starbucks breakfast sandwich!” does not necessarily mean that I want to marry it.

8) If everyone of your preferred gender suddenly disappeared from the face of the planet, would you prefer to switch teams or become celibate?
After a period of mourning over losing almost all of my friends, I would definitely switch teams. However, reading “The Last Man” series would have perhaps given me some false hope. (Although I haven’t finished it yet…so maybe there is no hope even in fiction?)

9) Would you be willing to donate your sperm/eggs for money, or just to help out couples who are unable to conceive?
If it weren’t as hard on the body and time consuming as I’ve heard it is to donate eggs, I would do it. However, I would want to make sure that the dad had some pretty strong genes to counteract my gimpy tendencies.

10) Do you think you could be genuinely happy being single for the rest of your life? (This is assuming that you just never meet/met mr./ms. right, not that something awful happened).
Only if everything else in my life (career, friends, money) was in line. So…probably not.

May 25, 2006
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

Supposedly, this is a meme for “adults”, gleaned from myspace. Apparently, adults are primarily concerned with bills, chores, drinking and sex. Sounds about right.

1. What bill do you hate paying the most?
Credit Card

2. What's the best place to eat a romantic dinner?
Park or beach.

3. Last time you Puked from Drinking (Details)?
Austin, March 2006. Details very well documented in previous blog entry.

4. When is the last time you got drunk and woke up in a strange place?
Never done that.

5. Name of your First Grade Teacher?
Can’t remember.

6. What do you really want to be doing right now?
Being done unpacking.

7. What did you want to be when you were growing up?
A vet or a journalist.

8.How many colleges did you attend before you settled on the one you graduated from?
Just the one.

9. Why did you wear the shirt that you have on right now?
Because it wasn’t dirty.

10. Gas Prices! First Thought?
Glad I don’t have a car.

11. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you where would you go and who would you take?
I just finished moving so the thought of doing it again is not at all pleasant. Besides, I already live in the city I want to live in.

12. First Thought When the alarm went off this morning?
Crap. It’s only Tuesday.

By the way, what’s with All the random capitalization In this meme?

13. Last thought before Falling asleep last night?
I am so damned tired, falling asleep should be a piece of…

14. Favorite style of Underwear?
Bikini briefs.

15. Favorite style of Underwear for the opposite sex?
Boxers.

16. What Errand/Chore do you despise?
Picking up my clothes.

17. If you didn't have to work would you?
I certainly wouldn’t work in an office. I would use my freedom to pursue non-fruitful career choices. And wouldn’t at all complain if they eventually made me money.

18. Sex or Sleep?
Why must I choose?

19. Your Favorite Cartoon Character?
Optimus Prime.

20. Favorite non sexual thing to do at night with a girl/boy?
Be lazy.

21. A secret that you wouldn't mind everyone knowing?
I only keep secrets that I don’t want everyone to know about. I know, weird, huh?

22. What was your First Car?
’89 Volvo station wagon.

23. Your Best Your Mamma Joke?
Your mamma is so fat that she has atherosclerosis.

24. Your Favorite Lunch Meat?
Deli style soy unicorn.

25. What do you get everytime you go into a WAWA?
The waha?

26. Beach Or Lake?
Beach

27. Do you think Marriage is an outdated ritual that was invented by people who died at 20?
Not exactly, but I definitely have other issues with the concept.

28. Who do you Stalk on myspace?
Comedians.

29. Favorite Guilty Pleasure?
Bad supernatural dramas.

30. Favorite Movie you wouldn’t want anyone to find out about?
I am not ashamed of loving bad cinema so this probably doesn’t apply to me.

31. What's your drink?
I like vodka-based drinks. And Cook’s campagne.

32. Cowboys or Indians?
Indians.

33. Cops or Robbers?
Robbers.

34. Do you cheer for the bad guys?
Not always, but often. Especially when they’re played by Gary Oldman.

35. What Hollyood star do you think resembles you best?
I frequently hear Patricia Arquette.

36. If you had to pick one which cast member of Lost would you be?
I don’t watch Lost anymore, but from the time that I did, I would go with Shannon because she got to make out with Sayid and then she got to die and didn’t have to be on that crappy show anymore.

37. What do you want when you are sick?
Malt-o-meal and bananas or ritz crackers and juice.

38. Who from High School would you like to run into?
Michael Cross.

39. What radio station is your car radio tuned to right now?
Don’t have a car, but I listen to indie 103.1 on the internet at work.

41. Stiffler or Oz?
Oz, but only if you mean the werewolf from Buffy. Otherwise, I don’t have a preference.

42. Norm or Cliff?
Totally don’t care.

43. The Cosby Show or the Simpsons?
Simpsons

44. Worst Relationship Mistake that you wish you could take back?
Giving a known asshole a second chance.

45. Do you Like the Person who sits directly across from you at work?
The person is a wall. And you know what? That wall is a FANTASTIC conversationalist.

46. If you could get away with it who would you kill?
The terrorists. I’m told they are the source of all the world’s problems.

47. What Famous person would you like to have dinner with?
Crispin Hellion Glover. (I know, predictable response. But damnit, it’s true).

48. What famous Person would you like to sleep with?
Captain Tight Pants

49. Have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher for its intended purpose?
No. Nor for its unintended purpose, but it could be fun.

50. Last book you read for real?
For really reals? I’m assuming you aren’t counting graphic novels so I will say “Superstud” by Paul Feig.

51. Do you have a teddy bear?
I have my dad’s old teddy bear, Fred and various other stuffed animals acquired over time and carrying too much sentimentality for me to be rid of them.

52. Strangest Place you have ever had sex?
North Carolina.

53. Strangest Place you have ever wanted to have sex?
Work.

54. How many times a day do you text?
4-5?

55. At this point in your life would you rather start a new career or relationship?
Career.

56. Do you go to church?
Nope.

57. Pencil or Pen?
Pen.

58. Describe your favorite Day?
No responsibilities and the sun shining.

60. How many jobs have you had?
12 or so?

61. What would be your “dream job”?
E! True Hollywood Story.

62. What do you want to achieve in life?
Contentment.

May 23, 2006
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

Thanks, MarkTapioKines.

1. What motion picture in your opinion is the “perfect movie” (doesn't have to be your favorite film)?
Zoolander. (Mark took my Back to the Future answer…also, BttF MIGHT be my favorite movie. But it's so hard for me to commit to just one.)

2. Which U.S. state do you think has the friendliest residents?
Austin. I know it's not a state, but it definitely felt different from the rest of Texas. Perhaps it should be emancipated.

3. What's the slobbiest thing about you/your behavior?
The clutter in which I choose to live.

4. What's the most anal, OCD thing about you/your behavior?
Writing EVERYTHING that I have to do in my day planner and making lists on top of that.

5. If you were thrown into a closet and had to eat your way through ONE foodstuff to get to the door, what would you choose?
One would hope the closet contained chips and salsa.

6. Have you ever met anybody born in the 19th century?
Nope. My granparents were born right at the beginning of the 20th.

7. What's the most expensive thing you've ever won?
I rarely win anything of value. The only thing that comes to mind is a Tenacious D LP. $15?

8. What is the oldest man-made thing in your house?
I believe it is my father's teddy bear, Fred. Fred is 60 and is looking quite worse for wear.

9. Do you think you look better now than you did when you were 21?
Not especially.

10. How many of your exes are married now?
Only one that I'm aware of. However, I only keep in touch with a handful. It's possible that a few of them are dead.

11. How many of your exes have kids?
None that I know of.

12. How many of your exes now “play for the other team”?
See above.

13. If you could bring one famous person back from the dead, who would you choose?
Buddy Holly. I would have loved to have seen how his music evolved in the 60's. However, I have a theory that he would have just become Elvis Costello before Declan MacManus had a chance to.

14. What musical instrument do you wish you could play really well?
Moog.

15. What foreign language do you wish you could speak fluently?
Italian. (Or Gaelic)

16. If you woke up tomorrow and could either speak that language or play that instrument, which would you choose?
The language would be more useful, of course. But the vanity in me would probably choose the moog.

17. What band do you wish had put out more albums during their existence?
Buddy Holly and The Crickets.

18. What household chore do you never get around to doing?
Washing my sheets. Gross, I know.

19. What household chore does it seem like you're doing all the time?
Scooping cat litter.

20. Put an “x” next to all of the following careers you think you'd be good at:
(X) doctor (only if I can be a plastic surgeon though).
() lawyer
() politician
() detective
() fashion designer
() teacher

May 16, 2006
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment