Today, for the first time, I passed a song on expert mode in D.D.R. That is all.
Hotter with a Beard: Jason Priestly Edition
His camp turn on Tru Calling rekindled my crush on Jason Priestly. And re-watching all the old Beverly Hills 90210 episodes on SoapNet reminds me how it started. He was hilarious on that show and the only character who was never annoying.
J.P. is hot with a beard, but he’s also adorable clean-shaven. He’s the one pin-up from that era whose popularity I really got. He had Wolverine hair before Hugh Jackman and Marcel cornered the market. And those side burns were something else.
I also recommend a hilarious little movie called Cold Blooded, written by Simpson’s writer and Wes Anderson’s BFF, Wallace Wolodarsky. Jason plays a bookie who discovers he has the loose morals needed to be a successful hit man. The killer cast also includes Robert Loggia, Janeane Garofalo and Michael J. Fox. It’s only available on VHS but it’s worth buying used or renting from your friendly neighborhood indie video store. Dust off that VCR and watch it.
Freaking Hot Topic. That Explains Everything.
I guess Trey and Matt are as tired of Twilight-mania as I am. Sure, they’re not as solid as they once were, but it makes me very happy that South Park can still crank out inspired gems after all these years. I loved the first goth kid episode and I’m happy to have those characters back. And, of course, every Butters-centric episode is usually a winner.
In “The Ungroundable”, the goth kids are usurped by the Vampire Kids, former Banana Republic preps who are inspired by Twilight (though it’s not mentioned by name, the characters are) and have decided to become dark and brooding. But they get it all wrong.
Trey has a perfect understanding of Old Skool Gothdom. I don’t know if he ever hung with the goths in high school but I know that the Cure is his favorite band. That’s probably why he was perfectly able to mimic Joy Division and Siouxsie and the Banshees to play in every Goth kids scene. It’s nice to have my teenage subculture accurately represented on TV. What happens to the South Park goths is similar to what happened when Marilyn Manson became big. Suddenly, everyone was wearing pleather and people suddenly lumped me in with those guys. ANNOYING.
Butters finally helps them track down the source of the problem: Hot Topic. Now they know what they must do.
After that, they hold a school assembly to explain the difference between them and the Vampire kids.
If you hate life, truly hate the sun, and need to smoke and drink coffee, you are goth. If, however, you like dressing in black cos it’s fun, enjoy putting sparkles on your cheeks, and following the occult while avoiding things that are bad for your health, you are most likely a douchebag vampire wannabe boner. Because anybody who actually thinks they’re a vampire is freaking retarded.
I watch South Park to laugh, but every once in a while, they also make me feel like I’m reading my dairy. For that reason, no matter how many crappy episodes they make, I will be a South Park fan forever.
Prop 8 Protest Signs: Greatest Hits
Self-evident, bitches:
Runner up:
And the clear winner:
PS: Hedgehogs Against Hate!
Klostermeme XIII
In honor of the release of Chinese Democracy, a day which Mr. Klosterman (and most everyone else) thought would never come, I think it’s time for another Klostermeme!
Chuck Klosterman IV is rife with meme fodder. The Klostermeme series features these questions, my answers, my speculations on how Klosterman would answer and an invitation to the reader to answer these questions in the comments!
Is there any widespread practice more futile than attempting to predict society’s future relationship with technology?
My Answer: Yes. Religion. Whether or not you are a religious person, you’re not going to know who’s right until you’re dead.
Klosterman Theory: Up until recently, he would have said “Wondering when Chinese Democracy will be released”. But now that it’s finally come to fruition, I think he would say it’s futile, but entirely unavoidable, to worry about how you are perceived by others.
Your answers in the comments!
Hotter with a Beard: Hugh Jackman Edition
Once again, Lindy West has crawled inside my brain and perfectly summed up my feelings with utmost hilarity. She’s absolutely the funnier version of me. I guess that makes her my nemesis though I have no desire to defeat her and my fist-shaking in her general direction is minimal.
I have always felt this way about Hugh Jackman, ever since I saw him as Wolverine (perfectly cementing my longtime crush on that little hairy dude) and then as someone called Leopold. Bearded Hugh Jackman is the only Hugh Jackman worth lusting after. Bearded Hugh is grizzled and sexy. Clean-shaven Hugh is, well, really effeminate looking. And while some people really enjoy that look in a man, I am not one of them.
The beard is the thing. Moreso than any other actor I can think of. Or even any other PERSON. It’s a practically supernatural phenomenon. Hugh Jackman has a magic beard. It’s the only explanation.
NFT Radar: Noc Noc
If you ever desire to lose an entire Friday to the darkness, I know just the place for you. Happy hour at the goth-themed bar/club starts at 5 pm and offers $1 PBRs and $2 wells. But here’s the killer: If you order a glass of wine ($5), they will upsell you to a bottle and you will take it. Why? An entire bottle is only $8. Throw in a couple of GIANT plates of tater tots or some personal pizzas and you’ve got yourself a party. It’s not unheard of to enter Noc Noc at 5, only to leave four hours later, drunk off your tits and wincing in the still-shining sunlight. It’s a sobering experience, but not sobering enough because try as you may, a night begun at the Noc Noc simply cannot continue past 11. $2 wells, people. But at least you only spent $20. Oh, if you’re so inclined, you can also stay past 9 for the nightly show. They have all manner of gothertainment including DJs, cabaret, burlesque and live music, all with a sinister edge. Allegedly, their burlesque acts really deliver the scary/sexy. Me, I’m in it for the savings.
1516 2nd Ave 98101
206-223-1333
www.clubnocnoc.com
X-posted from Not For Tourists.
Prop 8 Protest Reminder
It’s tomorrow in Volunteer Park.
10:30am Pre-rally festivities
NoonRally
1:00pmMarch down to Westlake Center
2:00pmSpeeches and Westlake rally
Check the official website for more details. I’m off to pick up sign-making materials now. I’ll try to make a couple extra. If you have slogan ideas, post them in the comments!
I already have this sign I cobbled together last minute to bring to the protest outside the Mormon church last Sunday:
I’m gonna make another one that says “Separate But Equal is so Passe”.
NFT Radar: The People’s Pub
There are lots of reasons to go to the German-themed People’s Pub. There’s the tap beer selection, which is a who’s who of Deutsch brews, but also tosses in some other Euro favorites (like Strongbow cider) for good measure. There are the board games and the high probability of scoring a table on any given night. Happy hour lasts till 7 so you don’t have to leave work early to partake. There’s a late night happy hour too. But personally, I’d go there for the food. The fried pickles are a popular item (I find them a little overwhelming and I’m so over aoli as a concept) as is anything ending in “schnitzel” or “wurst.” I’d recommend the fried tomato sandwich and the bread pudding. But whatever you decide to order, don’t forget to throw in some spatzle. Spatzle is the German’s greatest contribution to side-dishes. This incredible cross between noodles and dumplings can be enjoyed smothered in butter or blanketed with cheese. And it’s also fun to say. It’s pronounced “shpetz-luh.” See? Fun! It’s true the service can be spotty but the pluses definitely outweigh the minuses. Say it with me now. “Shpetz-luh!”
5429 Ballard Ave NW 98107
206-783-6521
www.peoplespub.com
X-posted from Not For Tourist.
Effed by the Wind 
