Today is one of those days when work is completely unbearable. I have done almost nothing today. I just cannot concentrate. This post is also pointless. So I will offer this as consolation.
knuckleball imperil anonymity brazier convict attainder
Dear new lady that works in our office,
It's one thing that your vocabulary skills are as appalling as that of our president's, and that you promote anti-intellectualism by making fun of my boss for using “big words”. That I can be amused by. But when you take two-hour lunches with your best friend and write them off as “business lunches” simply because she works at one of our competing firms, you piss me off. I got yelled at once for coming back 10 minutes late from my break. I have never abused my breaks like you do in your first month of employment here. And when you call to say you're going to be late, don't tell me. Tell your boss. I'm not going to rat on you, but sooner or later, he's going to catch on to the fact that you're late every day. And for god's sake, you already come in an hour later than we do. I realise you have to commute from Tacoma and there's traffic and whatnot, but seriously, lady. Leave earlier. And don't whine to me about not being a morning person because neither am I and I have to get here before you do. And also, don't tell me about how you hate wearing shoes. Don't try to commiserate with me by telling me candy makes you fat. It makes everyone fat. Don't eat it. And CERTAINLY don't tell me about how you are scared of rats. I will not sympathize with you and it's not worth my time to explain to you how ignorant you are. And finally, stop monopolizing my interns. Well, you can have the annoying one who has to ask me 100 questions about how to use the photocopier and the binding machine, but the other one is mine. Hands off.
Love,
Me
derp
I'll just say this. I scored this low because I am retarded in Math. Seriously, hopelessly retarded. I actually got a perfect score on the analogies and a near-perfect score on verbal in general. But for some reason, when I see a group of numbers, my brain goes on strike. Also, I think George Bush must have cheated.
Your SAT Score of 1200 Means: |
|
You Scored Higher Than Howard Stern
You Scored Lower Than George W. Bush You Scored Lower Than Al Gore You Scored Lower Than David Duchovny You Scored Lower Than Natalie Portman You Scored Lower Than Bill Gates |
| Your IQ is most likely in the 120-130 range |
| Equivalent ACT score: 26 |
|
Schools that Fit Your SAT Score:
The George Washington University University of California-San Diego Villanova University The University of Texas at Austin Penn State – University Park |
cruel and unusual
Holy shit, this game is fun!
look through the announcement
Bad Movie Monday reviews are back! Read this. It's safe for work. Unless laughter is frowned upon at your work. Soon, the old Bad Movie Monday reviews will be up and then I can go back to reading Faye's review of “The Butterfly Effect” once a week and people who did google searches for “pretend to be an amputee” and found our site will no longer be disappointed.
Happier days with lower interest rates
WEEKEND RECAP
Friday
Well, the long awaited, much fretted over day was upon us. I headed to the Cinerama straight after work to meet 1 Ben Dur and get in line. I am that much of a geek. However, since Ben and I were the first to arrive, we decided to lay low in his car until a line began to form. This is after I got a dirty look and an eye roll from the girl at the ticket counter. Hello, Cinerama employees. Do you know where you work?
Anywho, Ben and I pulled out our towels and waited. People began to trickle in, many dressed in bathrobes, many more with towels. This would have been fun were I not so damned nervous.
We got our seats in the balcony, which I will never sit in again. I didn't realise that they are designed for people over 6 feet, as there is a giant bar right at my eye level. So I knelt on my feet and prepared for the movie. I was hoping for a Serenity trailer but instead got “Monster in Law” and “Herbie: Fully Loaded”. Interesting demographic.
Spoilers contained herein.
The movie started and I was genuinely excited. I loved the dolphin musical number. I loved Martin Freeman as Arthur straight away. I also loved Mos Def as Ford and immediately forgot about the accent. He was perfectly awkward and quirky.
When the Earth blew up, I got chills. Fantastic. But they started hammering home the love story hooplah from the word go (a camera phone picture? Come on! Arthur is NOT that sentimental). I'll just go on the record right now and say that not only is Trillian not the love of Arthur's life (it's Fenchurch, as annoying as she was at times), but that the whole idea that Arthur would fall in love with some girl he met once at a party and harbor “feelings” for her after all these years is ridiculous. Furthermore, it's directly in opposition to the character of Arthur who is presumably so level-headed that he would never suspect his best mate to be an Alien. So un-romantic that it took him ages to work up the courage to do anything heroic. This is not a man who would hold out hope for a fleeting crush. If anything, Arthur's fixation on that party was more the fact that his manhood was called into question by Zaphod than a love-at-first-site situation.
As for Zaphod, well, I was TOTALLY buying Sam Rockwell’s performance…until that fucking second head popped up and I realized I would have rather had them have NO second head than do what they did. That flip top, Pez Dispenser thing looked cheap and was very distracting. That moment where chaos breaks out on the Heart of Gold and Zaphod runs around like an idiot with his head popping up and saying things is so horrible. Once he had the head removed, I could deal with Zaphod again.
The Humma Kavula episode was boring and contrived. I know they said Douglas Adams wrote this part himself but I can’t help but think that what he wrote was vastly changed post-mortem.
That strange woman who was in love with Zaphod was also boring and contrived.
Bill Nighy as Slartibartfast was probably one of my favorite parts. He was perfect and he reminded me of Jennifer Saunders from AbFab which was a take on that character that I never would have thought of.
Alan Rickman as Marvin was aight. Marvin just didn’t have much to do is all.
The ending made me want to vomit.
All in all, and I’ve thought about this quite a lot, the movie wasn’t as bad as it could have been. But it also wasn’t nearly as good as it could have been. I know that they had a lot of pressure to cater to the fans and also to a new audience, but unlike Peter Jackson, they chose the wrong things to take away from the story, leaving it an empty shell of a film. I realized after my post-film drinking binge, that most of my favorite parts of the story are Douglas Adam’s little philosophical tangents. I love how he dis-proves the existence of God. I love the bit about the 3-breasted whore. I love all the stuff about Ford’s past and how he is just basically this mooch who likes to get drunk and hang out with women. You don’t see any of that stuff in this film. I suppose, it’s to be expected because it’s a Disney film. But still, that darkness is part of Adam’s humor and, if you ask me, a very important part of the essence of the story. I don’t see how they could possibly made a decent sequel or sequels to this film without all that darkness because it only gets worse in that world for all those characters. Faye was right. Seeing this film, for me, was like seeing Fellowship of the Ring for her. It was more painful and stressful than just a fun movie-going experience. I need to see it again to solidify my thoughts because right now they are more emotional than reasonable.
And that’s all I’ll say about that. For now.
End of spoilers.
After the movie we went to the Nite Lite to drown ourselves in Journey sing-a-longs and beer. Aaaaah….
Saturday
Tobe went to the vet in the morning and we learned that he has gingivitis but is otherwise fine. We also learned that when he’s nervous, he has the ability to shed his bodyweight in fur.
After that, Faye and I took naps because we were HUNG OVER. Then we finished the script that we have been working on for 3 and a half years. Hoorah!
By that point, our brains were too fried to do anything but rent “Wild Things 2”. And thank god we did. Comedy. Gold. Faye is writing a review for it as we speak.
Sunday
Yoga hurts.
It's official
Your Geek Profile: |
| Movie Geekiness: Highest |
| Music Geekiness: Highest |
| Fashion Geekiness: Moderate |
| SciFi Geekiness: Moderate |
| Academic Geekiness: Low | Gamer Geekiness: Low | Geekiness in Love: Low | Internet Geekiness: Low | General Geekiness: None |
the day of reckoning…
Tonight is the night of truth. I'm going to see the long-awaited, much scrutinized, somewhat criticized and all around thin-ice-treading Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy with some fans of the books and some people who just like movies. It will be interesting to see what the fans think as opposed to the uninitiated. I am nervous. I don't want to hate it. I want to love it as I loved LOTR. Moreso, I want to love it more than I've ever loved a movie based on a beloved book. Time will tell. (And that time is 7:00 tonight).
In an unrelated topic, why is it that animals are cute when they yawn, but people aren't?
J.J. Abrahms is a hack.
Last night “Lost” was supposed to be an “all new episode”. But if you tuned in, you know it was actually just a clip show. A fucking CLIP SHOW. I call bullshit on that.
It's a good thing this wasn't a quiz about movies.
i am open-minded!
How indie are you? test by ridethefader
You're pretty knowledgeable about music in general. You like indie music, sure, but that's only part of it.
You'll listen to any old shit as long as it sounds good to you. You're not snobby about music at all, you
just like what you like. How boring. Curiously, this makes you popular with the opposite sex.
Effed by the Wind 
