Oscar Corrections and Retractions

Have you ever watched a trailer for a film that announced it's star as “Academy Award Winner Blah di Blah” and thought to yourself “I can't believe THEY won an Academy Award”? Or wondered why former Academy Award winners were making films like “The Devil's Advocate” or “The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen”? I certainly have. In fact, I wish that Oscars came with the stipulation that, should you at any point in your career find yourself a shadow of your former artistic integrity, that you can actually have your Oscar revoked. In honor of this notion, and the upcoming 80th annual Academy Awards (this Sunday, the 24th of February) I present to you:

10 ACADEMY AWARD WINNERS WHO SHOULD HAVE THEIR OSCARS REVOKED

1. Marisa Tomei. She won for Best Supporting Actress in 1992 for My Cousin Vinny. Yes, you read that right. A flimsy comedy based mostly on Brooklyn accent jokes won Tomei an OSCAR. There is a theory circulating that she was actually not the rightful winner and that the presenter called the wrong name. Seems reasonably sound to me considering the dignified Hollywood veterans she was up against (Judy Davis, Joan Plowright, Miranda Richadson, Venessa Redgrave).
Revocation Worthy: Untamed Heart, also starring Christian Slater about a girl who falls in love with a simpleton who believes he has a baboon's heart. What? I know.

2. Halle Berry. She made history in 2001 as the first African American actress to win an Oscar for Best Actress. This was for Monster's Ball, a misogynistic, vaguely racist melodrama that the Academy just adored. But that's beside the point.
Revocation Worthy: Razzie award winner Catwoman. Poorly scripted “thriller” Gothika in which Berry's performance was outshined by her Nut House Chic wardrobe. Making Storm the most useless character in all of the X-Men films.

3. Cuba Gooding, Jr.. In 1996, Cuba was rewarded for the energetic delivery of one of the most irritating catch phrases in cinematic history. The Academy showed him the Oscar for Best Supporting actor in Jerry Maguire.
Revocation Worthy: Helming the unnecessary sequel (I didn't even want the first one), Daddy Day Camp. A comically bad performance as a mentally challenged football enthusiast in Radio (note: Pretty much ANY actor who plays the Retard Card is off my Christmas card list.) Acting alongside talking huskies in Snow Dogs. The homophobic comedy Boat Trip. Everything.

4. Jon Voight. Who could forget Jon Voight in his star-making turn in Midnight Cowboy and his Oscar-winning leading role in 1978's Coming Home? Now he's more famous for being crazier than his crazy daughter, Angelina Jolie.
Revocation Worthy: Though I REALLY want to forgive him due to his inspired role as a hardened coal miner in Zoolander, these titles speak for themselves: Anaconda, Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2, Bratz, The Karate Dog.

5. Jack Nicholson. He took home a total of 3 Mr. Goldies. 1975 for Best Actor in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, 1983 for Best Supporting Actor in Terms of Endearment and in 1997 for Best Actor in As Good As It Gets. The last role seemed to seal the deal for Nicholson. His Pavlovian response kicked in and he has played nothing but elderly curmudgeons ever since.
Revocation Worthy: The Bucket List.

6. Geena Davis. Another surprising recipient, Davis won Best Actress in 1988 for The Accidental Tourist.
Revocation Worthy: Way before Johnny Depp made pirates beloved, her husband Renny Harlin cast her in a little film called Cutthroat Island which goes down in the Guinness Book of World Records as the biggest loss of money for a film company ever. I didn't see it either.

7. Sean Connery. This Jeopardy enthusiast snagged an award in 1987 for Best Supporting Actor in The Untouchables. For this, people would continue to confuse his baffling “Scottish” accent and cocky delusions as good acting for years to come.
Revocation Worthy: The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Dragonheart.

8. Whoopie Goldberg. In 1990, Whoopie was awarded Best Supporting Actress for her role as a fraudulent medium who is haunted by Patrick Swayze. For me, this is another one of those “Shouldn't have happened in the first place” moments. But happen it did.
Revocation Worthy: Theodore Rex.

9. Robert De Niro. This veteran actor who yell-acts his way through current movie roles (see also Al Pacino), was once a legitimate talent. He won Best Supporting Actor in 1974 for The Godfather Part II and Best Actor in 1980 for Raging Bull. These were inarguably great performances in great films. However…
Revocation Worthy: Analyze This and Analyze That could be considered parodies if they weren't so humorless. I'm sorry, but Meet the Parents and especially Meet the Fockers are embarrassing for everyone involved. And just what the hell was he doing in Stardust?!

10. James Cameron. The only director on this list, James Cameron took home an ungodly amount of awards in 1996 for his epic fluff-fest, Titanic. However, I don't think he should have been rewarded for this in the first place. Seriously. Take his awards away. Have you seen it lately? Kate Winslet and a talented supporting cast aside (Billy Zane!) Titanic really sucks. If you ask me, his Terminator films and Aliens were the only award worthy films in the Cameron Oeuvre.
Revocation Worthy: Titanic.

X-Posted from the the Reel.

Advertisements

Leave a comment

No comments yet.

Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s