A couple of months ago, my department was hiring Quality Control Assistants. It’s a fancy title for one who watches our content from start to finish and tells me if there’s anything wrong with it. I couldn’t believe my luck when a gregarious fellow named Chas walked into my office. He was gregarious as hell, enthusiastic about the job and, more importantly, didn’t blink an eye when I told him the embarrassingly paltry sum he would receive in exchange for his services. It helped that when we got to talking, I learned that he was originally from the east coast and had not only heard of all the Richmond punk bands I grew up listening to, but was a fan of them as well. What a find!
What I didn’t know until later, was that Chas was also fast becoming a local celebrity. Every week he would invite me to the shows he put on at Re-Bar and every week, I would, sadly, have other plans. I finally made it to one event, a Homecoming-themed fundraiser for Barack Obama, and had a blast. But I still haven’t been able to make it to the real breadwinner event, Get Loweded. Well, this week, my dear Chas has been profiled in the Stranger. The article reveals still more fascinating details about this unique and precious snowflake and I feel very unfortunate, indeed, to have not been able to make it to prior Get Loweded events. I STILL can’t make it to the next one, but I’m definitely going to the one after that. By then, however, it will probably be the hottest ticket in town. At least I can say I knew Chas when. Even if it was only seconds before he exploded like a supernova.
Effed by the Wind 