1) Are you currently in a relationship or single?
Relationship.

2) Are you happy with where you are?
Mostly.

3) When was the last time you went on a date?
Last Friday. Sort of.

4) Did you enjoy it?
Yes.

5) What was your longest relationship?
3 years.

6) Why did it end?
It hasn’t yet. I’m going to predict alien abduction.

7) Who broke up with whom?
The alien.

8) When you meet the right person, do you fall fast?
Yeah. I’m a dope that way.

9) Have you ever cheated on someone?
No.

10) Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is acceptable?
I feel that there are circumstances which lead people to believe that it is warranted. But in the end, it would have been better for both parties to end it BEFORE the third party entered into the picture sexually.

11) Have you talked about marriage with another person or have you been married?
Talked about it. Realized it’s not for me.

12) Do you want children?
I really don’t.

13) If yes how many?
-2.5

14) Would you consider adoption?
If I were, for some ungodly reason, to want children, that would be the way to go.

15) If somebody liked you right now, what do you think a cool unique way of showing you would be?
Boom box and trench coat. (KIDDING)

16) Do you enjoy a chase?
I used to.

17) Be honest, do you play the “game” when you are dating someone?
I don’t really know what that means. Therefore, I’m going to say no. I was always pretty frustrated with the “gaming” aspect of it. When I liked someone, I would let them know, and they could take it or leave it. It was when they played ambiguous that I would get frustrated. I guess I’m kind of aggressive when it comes to attaining the men.
19) Do you believe love at first sight exists?
No. That’s stupid.

20) Are you a romantic?
Not in the traditional sense.

21) If money wasn't an object, what would you do on your next date with someone you like?
Go to Europe in a private jet (preferably silent and invisible), see a show, go pubbing and fly home.

22) Outdoor date or indoor?
Depends on the whether.

How important is…
23) Money?
In terms of picking who I date? Not at all. In fact, the only rich guy I dated was a total prick.

24) Physical attraction?
Very important.

25) Body type?
I have no body type-type. I’ve been with all shapes and sizes. But I do have to be attracted to them.

26) Brains?
Extremely important.

27) Animal lover?
Pretty important. I find that people who don’t like animals tend to be pretty Machiavellian in their ways. And I don’t jive with the Prince.

28) Good sex?
Important.

29) Kinky sex?
Kinky is relative.
30) Religion?
I wouldn’t mind a spiritual person, but I doubt I could ever date (or even be real friends with) a hardcore Christian.

31) Do you believe that you can change someone?
No.

32) If you could get married anywhere, money not an object?
I still wouldn’t.

33) How important is age?
Not terribly. But there is a statute of limitations on propriety. Still, Harold and Maude is one of my favorite movies.

34) Do you easily give in when you are fighting?
Yes. Unless it’s something I’m REALLY right about.

35) Do you have feelings for someone right now, whether they know or not?
Yes. And they know it. I wear my goddamned heart on my sleeve.

December 16, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

Appearance
[X] I am shorter than 5'4.
[x] I think I'm ugly sometimes.
[X] I have many scars.
[ ] I tan easily.
[X] I wish my hair were a different color.
[X] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[X] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I've had braces.
[x] wear glasses.
[x] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100 safe, free of cost, and
scar-free.
[x] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ] I have more than 2 piercings.
[ ] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[X] I have freckles.

Family/Home Life
[X] I've sworn at my parents.
[ ] I've run away from home.
[ ] I've been kicked out of the house.
[ ]My biological parents are together.
[ ]I have a sibling less than one year old.
[ ] I've had children.
[ ] I've lost a child.

School/Work
[ ] I'm in school.
[x] I have a job.
[x] I've fallen asleep at school.
[x] I almost always do my homework.
[ ] I've missed a week or more of school.
[ ] I've been on the Honor Roll within the last 2 years.
[ ] I failed more than 1 class last year.
[x] I've stolen something from my job
[X] I've been fired.

Embarrassment
[ ] I've slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[x] Disney movies still make me cry. (only the old ones)
[ ] I've peed from laughing.
[x] I've snorted while laughing.
[x] I've laughed so hard I've cried.
[ ] I've glued my hand to something
[x] I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[ ] I've had my pants rip/drop in public

Health
[X] I was born with a disease/impairment.
[x] I've gotten stitches.
[x] I've broken a bone.
[ ] I've had my tonsils removed.
[x] I've sat in a doctors office with a friend.
[x] I've had my wisdom teeth removed.
[x] I had a serious surgery.
[x] I've had chicken pox.

Traveling
[X] I've driven over 200 miles in one day.
[x] I've been on a plane.
[x] I've been to Canada.
[x] I've been to Mexico.
[x] I've been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I've been to Japan.
[ ] I've Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[x] I've been to Europe.
[ ] I've been to Africa.

Experiences
[x] I've gotten lost in my city.
[X] I've seen a shooting star.
[ ] I've wished on a shooting star.
[X] I've seen a meteor shower.
[x] I've gone out in public in my pajamas.
[ ] I've pushed all the buttons on an elevator
[x] I've kicked a guy where it hurts.
[x] I've been to a casino.
[ ] I've been skydiving.
[x] I've played spin the bottle.
[ ] I've drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[x]I've crashed a car.
[x] I've been Skiing
[x] I've been in a play.
[X] I've met someone in person from the internet. (Mark!)
[x] I've caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[x] I've seen the Northern Lights.
[x] I've sat on a roof top at night.
[ ] I've played chicken.
[x] I've played a prank on someone.
[x] I've ridden in a taxi.
[x] I've seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x] I've eaten Sushi.
[ ] I've been snowboarding.

Relationships
[ ] I'm single
[X] I'm in a relationship.
[ ] I'm engaged.
[ ] I'm married.
[x] I've gone on a blind date.
[x] I've been the dumpee more than the dumper.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[ ] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ ] I've cheated in a relationship.
[ ] I've gotten divorced
[x] I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
[x] I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
[ ] I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
[x] I've kept something from a past relationship.

Sexuality
[x] I've had a crush on someone of the same sex
[x] I've had a crush on a teacher
[ ] I am a cuddler.
[x] I've been kissed in the rain.
[ ] I've hugged a stranger.
[x] I have kissed a stranger.

Honesty/Crime
[x] I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't
[x] I've done something I promised myself I wouldn't.
[x] I've snuck out of my house.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I've cheated while playing a game.
[X] I've cheated on a test.
[X] I've run a red light. not on purpose though
[x] I've been suspended from school.
[x] I've witnessed a crime.
[ ] I've been in a fist fight.
[ ] I've been arrested.
[x] I've shoplifted.

Death and Suicide
[x]I'm afraid of dying.
[X] I hate funerals. Does anyone like them?
[x] I've seen someone dying.
[ ] Someone close to me has attempted suicide.
[ ] Someone close to me has committed suicide.
[ ] I've planned my own suicide.
[ ] I've attempted suicide.
[x] I've written a eulogy for myself.

Materialism
[x] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I own iPod or MP3 player.
[ ] I have an unhealthy obsession with anime/manga.
[ ] I own multiple designer purses, costing over $100 a piece.
[X] I own something from Hot Topic.
[ ] I own something from Pac Sun.
[x] I collect comic books.
[x] I own something from The Gap.
[x] I own something I got on e-bay.
[ ] I own something from Abercrombie.

Random
[x] I love to sing.
[ ] I've stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[ ] I open up to others easily.
[x] I watch the news.
[x] I don't kill bugs.
[x] I curse regularly.
[x] I sing in the shower.
[ ] I am a morning person.
[ ] I paid for my cell phone ring tone.
[x] I'm a snob about grammar.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic.
[ ] I twirl my hair
[ ] I have “x”s in my screen name
[ ] I love being neat
[x] I love Spam
[ ] I've copied more than 30 CD's in a day
[x] I bake well.
[ ] My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue.
[ ] I would wear pajamas to school.
[ ] I like Martha Stewart.
[ ] I know how to shoot a gun.
[ ] I am in love with the idea of love.
[ ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
[ ] I eat fast food weekly.
[x] I believe in ghosts.
[ ] I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
[x] I've not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[ ] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[ ] I love white chocolate
[X] I bite my nails.
[X] I play video games.
[X] I'm good at remembering faces.
[ ] I'm good at remembering names
[ ] I'm good at remembering dates.
[ ] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life…

[X] My answers are totally honest

December 15, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

5 things…

List FIVE things you don't like about yourself:

1. my chub

2. my laziness

3. my forgetfulness

4. my nervous stroke-victim mouth

5. my gimpyness

What are FIVE things that you do like about yourself:

1. having been brought up to treat others well

2. my awesome taste in movies/music

3. my magical boobies

4. my crazy liberal ideals

5. my resolve

What are FIVE qualities you look for in a friend:

1. loyalty

2. commonality

3. humor

4. consideration

5. appreciation of my dorkyness

What are FIVE things that will cause you to avoid a person:

1. pretension

2. homophobia/racism

3. liars

4. attention whoring

5. extreme seriousness

What are FIVE things you look for in a boy/girl:

1. sense of humor

2. creativity

3. beards (yes, that goes for girls too)

4. thoughtfulness

5. good liver

What are FIVE things you'd like to change in your life:

1. Job

2. Athleticism

3. Job

4. Less stress

5. Job

What are FIVE things you wouldn't ever want to change in your life:

1. My friends

2. My career goals

3. My love for bad movies

4. The city in which I live

5. My poopy-butted cat

Who are FIVE people you think are awesomer than awesome, and you're not afraid to tell them so:

1. Dom

2. Meep

3. Sherwood

4. Mark

5. Elyse

December 15, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

1. DO YOU SNORE?
No.

2. ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER?
50/50

3. WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR?
Wasting my life.

4. AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC?
Inasmuch as I had Legos and loved to play with them. I wasn’t nearly as cool as Zach or Jack though.

5. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF “REALITY” TV?
There’s too much of it for sure, but some of it is addictive.

6. DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?
No.

7. WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?
If you like that sort of thing.

8. IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?
N/A.

9. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?
Black at work, white at home.

10. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?
Occasionally.

11. HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?
No.

12. ANY SECRET TALENTS?
Ask your mom.

13. WHAT'S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?
A city with good weather and lots to do.

14. IS JAY LENO FUNNY?
According to a lot of comedians I respect, he used to be. But I don’t remember it.

15. CAN YOU SWIM?
I can keep afloat.

16. HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE “DONNIE DARKO”?
Yes. Why?

17. DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE?
It would be pretty stupid not to. And there are a lot of stupid people out there.

18. HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE POP?
I believe it’s three-hee.

19. CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?
Not without pausing a lot.

20. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE?
Tons.

21. ARE YOU AN ONLY CHILD?
No.

22. DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENER?
Never really thought about it. I haven’t seen an electric pencil sharpener since middle school.

23. WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?
It’s barbaric and unnecessary.

24. IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?
No.

25. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
I don’t mind it, but other people seem to enjoy making fun of it.

26. WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?
Penicillin, sulfa, moldy cheeses, pollen.

27. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID?
Fuck?
2 minutes ago under my breath. I prefaced it with “what the”.

28. IS ELVIS STILL ALIVE?
No. But Tupac is.

29. DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?
Only if they go over the 30-minute mark.

30. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
Poached.

31. ARE BLONDES DUMB?
Is this an earnest question? Jesus.

32. WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?
In my butt.

33. WHAT TIME IS IT?
Time for you to write some more interesting questions, dipshit.

34. DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?
Yes.

35. IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING?
Yes.

36. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR?
Dude. Seriously. You’re questions are making me sleepy.

37. DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?
Showers

38. IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?
Ask Paris Hilton.

39. DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED?
Yes.

40. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?
No.

41. WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?
Caffeine.

42. CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?
Creamy.

43. CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK?
Yes.

44. HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?
No.

45. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY?
Once.

46. IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?
If you want it to be. But it’s not for everyone.

47. ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?
Only when I’m drunk.

48. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?
Blue.

50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?
Occasionally.

51. WHO'S BETTER? johnny damon > derek jeter?
I don’t care.

52. ARE YOU PSYCHIC?
No one is.

53. HAVE YOU READ “CATCHER IN THE RYE”?
Many many times.

54. DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?
Skin flute.

55. HAVE U EVER STOLEN MONEY?
When I was 16, I stole $20 from my mom’s purse like a little punk to buy an Avail CD. That’s it though.

56. CAN YOU SNOWBOARD?
No.

57. DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?
Yes, as long as it’s warm.

58. DO U SNORT WHEN U LAUGH?
Every once in a while.

59. DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?
Only the magic in a young girl’s heart.

60. ARE DOGS A MAN'S BEST FRIEND?
Bite me.

61. YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?
Why? Did Santa Claus tell you it wasn’t real?

62. CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?
Not really.

63. DO YOU MAKE A LOT OF MISTAKES?
Yes.

64. IS IT COLD OUTSIDE TODAY?
Yes.

65. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
Instant black bean soup.

66. DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH?
When the mood strikes me.

67. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KISSED?
Shut up.

68. WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?
Any of those Welch’s commercial with the creepy precocious kids.

69. DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?
No.

70. FAVORITE BAND AT THE MOMENT?
The Fuckbots.

December 6, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

10 longest running friends (From the time that we became friends, not necessarily when I first met them). Obviously, I have no current friends from pre-college. Is that sad?

1. Kristie (since summer 1996)
2. Nikki (since fall 1996)
3. Frank (since spring 1997)
4. Erin (since summer 1998)
4. Faye (since summer 1998)
5. Jacob (since summer 1999)
6. Sherwood (since summer 2000)
7. DJ (since summer 2000)
8. Dan (since summer 2001)

9. Ryan (since fall 2002)
10. Dom (since summer 2003)

9 of your favorite foods

Peanut Butter
Milk
Fuji Apples
Portobello Mushrooms
Quesadillas
Baked beans
Potatoes in any form
Snack Pack
Lentils

8 of your favorite movies (This is never not a difficult question for me)

Back to the Future
The Beaver Trilogy
Night of the Living Dead
Human Nature
Straight to Hell
Dellamorte Delamore
True Romance
Harold and Maude

7 of your favorite shows of all time

The Young Ones
The State
Freaks and Geeks
Mr. Show
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Angel
Firefly

6 of your favorite songs

“Sad Song” Oasis
“Janie Jones” The Clash
“Countdown” Pulp
“It Doesn’t Matter Anymore” Buddy Holly
“Acquiesce” Oasis
“Major Tom (Coming Home)” Peter Shilling

5 stores you shop at

Safeway
Rainbow Grocery
Crossroads
Ross Dress For Less
Red Light

4 things you’re afraid of

Getting trapped in and/or crashing to my death in an elevator
Never making a living doing what I love
Becoming my mother
Living in regret

3 of your favorite bands/artists

Oasis
Buddy Holly
The Clash

2 of your most prized possessions

My original painting by Shannon Freshwater of Crispin Glover turning a cat into a jello mold.
My autographed Ron Jeremy picture

1 wish you’ve always dreamed of coming true

Painless and inexpensive full knee replacement.

November 30, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

This is one is KINDA cool on account of the comparison betwixt the you's of old and new. But then again, those same questions keep coming up. Oh well…

15 years ago…

How old were you? 12

What grade were you in? Grade 7

Where did you go to school? The Millwood School. A VERY small private school. There were only 6 people in my class. It was a horrible place.

Where did you work? I think I MIGHT have babysat once at that point in my life.

Where did you live? Midlothian, VA.

Where did you hang out? My only friend at school, Sharon Schofield, and my neighbor, Dawn Weber. Sharon was a borderline hardcore Christian. She took me to a concert by a religious rock singer called Carmen, who was kind of like the Christian Neil Diamond. It was an eye-opening experience, to say the least. Dawn was a super cool girl who had ripped jeans like Debbie Gibson and listened to They Might Be Giants. I wonder where she is now.

How was your hair style? I do believe that was the year I tried to get poofy bangs like all the cool girls. Anyone who knows how impossibly straight my hair is can imagine how badly that turned out.

Did you wear braces? Nope. That’s the ONE genetic blessing I have. Problem-less teeth.

Did you wear glasses? No. My eyes didn’t start to go till adulthood.

Who was your boyfriend/girlfriend? Well, I WANTED it to be either Fred Savage or Bart Simpson. But instead it was my hand.

Who was your celebrity crush? Fred Savage and Bart Simpson.

Who was your regular-person crush? For a while I had a crush on a boy named Lyle. Being that our school was so small, my options were pretty limited. But Lyle, it turns out, was a total A-hole and he, like everybody else, only wanted to go out with Nikki, the beautiful blonde girl who’s mother was called “Bunny”.

Were you a virgin? And then some.

How many piercings did you have, not including ears? Not a one.

How many tattoos did you have? Zilch. I didn’t try to make my own tattoo until I was 14.

What was your favorite band? Def Leppard. How I wasn’t considered cool at my school, I have NO idea.

What was your biggest fear? The other kids finding out about how crazy my mother was.

Had you smoked a cigarette yet? No

Had you gotten drunk or high yet? My mom used to give me and my brother hot chocolate and Schnapps at Christmas time, but not enough to get me drunk.

Had you driven yet? I’d barely learned to ride a bike.

Which of your pets were still alive? My cats; Cinderella, Katie and Curry.

NOW IT'S FALL 2005

How old are you? 27

What grade are you in? The grade of life

Where do you go to school? The school of knard hocks.

Where do you work? Poopypants Capital Management

Where do you live? Seattle, WA

Where do you hang out? MOSTLY: The Canterbury, Wok and Grill, Faye's apartment, my apartment. Occassionally: Shorty's, The Dragonfish, The Nite Lite. I'm willing to try anywhere once, though.

How is your hair style? Long and straight as can be with bangs.

Do you wear braces? No sir.

Do you wear glasses? Only at the movies. The rest of the time, my world has a vague, blurry outline.

Who is your boyfriend/girlfriend? Gadzook

Who is your celebrity crush? Oh, I have dozens. To name a few: Joss Whedon, Ackles and Padalecki, Nathan Fillion, Gina Torres & Asia Argento in my pocket.

Who is your regular-person crush? Elyse after seeing her in Cats.

Are you a virgin? Not especially.

How many piercings do you have, not including ears? I’m pretty sure my ear holes are currently non-functional. So I’m going with none.

How many tattoos do you have? Two with (hopefully) one on the way.

What is your favorite band? It will probably always be Oasis, no matter how much their new stuff sucks ass.

What is your biggest fear? Dying with regret.

Have you smoked a cigarette yet? Mmmhmm.

Have you gotten drunk or high yet? Not today. But it IS 9:30…

Have you driven yet? Yes. But not well.

Which of your pets are still alive? From 15 years ago? Katie (lives with my mom) and possibly Curry.

November 17, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment

Thank you

1. REAL FIRST NAME:
Jessica

2. WHAT IS THE MOST PHYSICAL PAIN YOU HAVE EVER BEEN IN?
Migraine

3. DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE GUM WITH YOU?
Most of the time

4. WHAT KIND OF MOUTHWASH DO YOU PREFER?
None. It burns.

5. ARE YOU GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BI?
I have the odd girl on girl fantasy but, I definitely prefer the dudes. By the way, I just started watching Queer as Folk and I’m addicted. It’s basically the PERFECT porn for girls who like dudes because it’s porn that is all men and has a good story.

6. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE A GOOD KISSER?
I don’t suck.

7. WOULD YOU SEVER YOUR OWN PINKY FINGER WITH A KNIFE FOR 10 MILLION DOLLARS?
Yes.

8. DO YOU THINK MIDGETS ARE CREEPY?
No way.

9. DO YOU BELIEVE IN A HIGHER BEING?
Not really.

10. IF YOU ARE A SMOKER, WHAT IS YOUR BRAND?
Stogie.

11. WHAT IS YOUR DRUG OF CHOICE?
Alcohol.

12. BIG TRUCKS, LUXURY CARS, MOTOR CYCLES, OR FAST CARS?
Public transportation or vespas.

13. WHAT KIND OF SUNGLASSES DO YOU WEAR?
The kind you can buy at the drug store for less than $15.

15. DOES YOUR LOCAL WATER TASTE GOOD?
Not at all. Though it might just be the rusty pipes in my apartment.

16. WHAT KIND OF PC DO YOU HAVE?
I don’t remember. It was a hand-me-down and I was just happy to receive it.

17. WHAT IS/WAS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH?
I am quite fond of the West Coast Roasted Veggie sandwiches from Organic-To-Go.

18. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BREAKFAST FOOD?
Cereal or a good fry up.

19. WHAT IS THE OLDEST ITEM IN YOUR HOUSE?
Probably Dom’s antique radio. After that, my VHS copy of The Empire Strikes Back.

20. HOW MANY CD’S DO YOU HAVE?
500 or thereabouts.

21. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SO DRUNK YOU WET THE BED?
Not yet.

22. IF YOU COULD HAVE SEX WITH ANY ONE PERSON [ED: EXCLUDING SPOUSES], WHO WOULD IT BE?
It’s hard to say because I don’t actually KNOW any of my celebrity crushes, and if I got to know them, I might not want them anymore. But something tells me Jarvis Cocker would be all about the pleasing of the nether-regions.

23. HAVE YOU EVER UNDERGONE SURGERY?
Many times. And they are well documented and all medically necessary to some degree.

24. WHEN YOU STUB YOUR TOE OR BUMP YOUR HEAD, WHAT DO YOU USUALLY SAY?
Fuck! I don’t suppose we’re very imaginative when we injure ourselves.

25. DO YOU ENJOY MAKING PEOPLE FEEL STUPID?
Not at all.

26. WHO IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE PERSON AT WORK/SCHOOL?
This is also well documented.

27. WHAT BRAND IS YOUR CELL PHONE?
T-Mobile

28. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CAUGHT MASTURBATING?
No.

29. HAVE YOU EVER CAUGHT ANYONE MASTURBATING
Yes.

30. WHEN IS THE LAST TIME YOU PUKED?
About 6 months ago, I think.

31. HOW OLD ARE YOU?
Old enough to know better.

32. WOULD YOU RATHER SKY DIVE OR BUNGEE JUMP?
Sky Dive.

33. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ARRESTED?
No.

34. HOW OFTEN DO YOU SHAVE?
depends on the time of year and the likelihood of anyone finding out

35. DO YOU THINK THE MIDGET QUESTION (8.) WAS OVER THE LINE?
Uh…no?

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BEER?
Blackthorns Cider, and, if you don’t count cider, Moretti.

38. ARE YOU RACIST?
Not that I know of.

39. DO YOU THINK FARTS ARE FUNNY?
Generally.

40. LIBERAL, CONSERVATIVE, OR NEITHER?
Generally liberal. But I’m not a fan of extremists in either direction.

44. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF YOUR BODY?
Eyes or boobs.

45. ARE YOU STILL THINKING ABOUT THE MIDGET QUESTION?
Dude, get over it.

46. IF AN ENTIRE STATE IN AMERICA WERE TO VANISH, WHICH DO YOU THINK WOULD NOT LIKELY BE MISSED?
FLORIDA!

47. HAVE YOU EVER FLUSHED A DECEASED PET DOWN THE TOILET?
No. I have given every pet a proper burial.

48. WHO ARE BETTER DRIVERS, MEN OR WOMEN?
Shut up.

49. ARE YOU SEXIST?
I try not to be but I definitely get along better with men than women.

50. WHAT DO YOU THINK THE DUMBEST SPORT IS?
Hunting.

51. DO YOU FORWARD CHAIN EMAILS THAT CLAIM TO BE GOOD/BAD LUCK?
Absolutely not.

52. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING THIS VERY SECOND?
How much time is left on my lunchbreak?

53. DO YOU SLOW DOWN AT CAR ACCIDENTS ATTEMPTING TO CATCH A GLIMPSE?
Since I’m never driving, I have the luxury of rubbernecking without consequences.

54. WHAT SHOULD YOU BE DOING OTHER THAN CHECKING YOUR LJ?
Reading a book?

55. HAVE YOU EVER HAD JURY DUTY?
I was called when I was overseas but, being abroad, I was exempt.

56. DO YOU KNOW YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER OFF THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD?
Yes.

58. ERA OYU DYXLESIC?
Cute.

59. DID YOU ENJOY THIS SURVEY MORE THAN THE AVERAGE “TIRED” ONES THAT HAVE BEEN GOING AROUND FOREVER?
I’ve had better.

60. IF YOU COULD SLEEP WITH ANY MILF….
Do Pam Grier, Jennifer Tilly or Angela Basset have kids?

October 28, 2005
Categories: Dear Diary, Meme Crazy . . Author: Baxter . Comments: Leave a comment