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So I was going to write a long recount of yesterday, but Dom beat me to it. Not complaining though. I would like to add a few things though.

I had a good time waiting in line for the comedy thing. I played Gin with some high school kids who actually weren't that annoying. And they knew who they were going to see which was nice. Kinda reminded me of my youth. But with more friends. Ha ha.
The comedy show itself was pretty cool too. Fred Armisen came out and did a hilarious act as Sadam Husein as a british musician. Pretty brilliant, actually. Next was the comedic musical stylings of Hard N Phirm who are best known for doing a bluegrass medly of Radiohead songs called “Rodeohead”. They sang a song about Patriotic Dinasaurs, complete with slideshow. Very funny. Finally, our man Zach Galifianakis came out. He was hilarious as always, but I think he underestimates his audience. He seems to assume that he doesn't have any hardcore fans and therefore, even though there are a few new jokes, we hear the same act each time. Zach, I know TV's Tru Calling keeps you pretty busy, but we want a new act! How much harder do we have to support you before you give us new jokes?

After that we putzed around the festival. We went to an ok beer garden where I saw the drummer for Alice In Chains. When I was 14, that would have made my day. Now it's not that big of a deal. But it does surprise me that I don't see more people wandering around Seattle. I mean, come on Mark Arm and Kim Thayil. No one's gonna mob you or anything.

The Pixies were aight. They seemed to be going through the motions though. I can't imagine they've resolved too many of the issues that caused their breakup. It's a Cash Cow tour. But it was neat to be able to say I saw them.

Today I am back at work. I feel SOMEWHAT rested but the stress is starting all over again. There's a ton of work to catch up on, and the cleaning people threw away everything in my boss's in-box. (What the fuck?!) so I've had to deal with “describing the papers” and things all morning while they fish through the garbage looking for this stuff. The really bad news that comes along with that is that it's the last straw for Ken. He's been wanting to move our office for a while because a lot of little fucked up things like that happen in this building. Also, the rest of our floor is empty and clients think it's “weird”. We've actually had potential clients decline to sign up with us because of it. So boss man wanted to move when our lease was up. But now he wants to sublet and move ASAP. And he wants to move AWAY from downtown. I DON'T want that. It's not up to me, of course. But I WILL be the one looking for places, so hopefully I will be able to find better deals downtown than in South Lake Union where he (and Lil' Dictator) want to move. I LIKE WORKING DOWNTOWN! It's one of the only things that keeps my days interesting. No more daily trips to the library. No more lunches with Roxy. No more running errands at lunch time or trying lots of different places to eat. I don't know what is around South Lake Union but I'm pretty sure there's not as many food choices or shopping. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
But we'll see what happens, I guess. We'll see. At least we're not moving to Bellevue. That's what boss wanted originally. I would definitely quit were we to move to Bellevue. That is a bus ride in hell that I could not take.

It doesn't get any easier than this

Today is my first day of getting paid to do what I love. I woke up at 9:00, ate breakfast and began editing and getting things ready to go out to festivals. It has been a blast. Now I am going to shower, and go buy some more DVDs for festival submission, after which I will come back, make dinner, and later, finish up Faye's short in time to send it out to the Bellingham Projections Festival tomorrow. It has been a good day. I still have a LOT more to do, but the good news is that tomorrow, my company has decided to close at noon! So I can come home and edit some more! All on the company dime. They don't KNOW they're paying me for this, but I'm getting paid for it nonetheless and it's a WONDERFUL feeling. I can't wait until the day when it's official.

@floppy `ones. che!ck it %out `

So I just spent over an hour in the most horrible meeting ever. Basically, it was just me sitting there trying to not make eye contact with everybody while my boss and the Lil'est Dictator argued. Yelling was involved, almost exclusively coming from the L.D. It would have gone on for ages had my boss not conceded and ended the meeting. I am relieved to be back here at my desk and ever MORE relieved to know that I have tomorrow off.
All this after a similarly distressing afternoon yesterday when L.D. argued needlessly about whether or not she should have to answer the phone when I'm in the bathroom or at lunch. The argument was long and stupid because she was the only one arguing anything. The short of it is that my boss said we should all be responsible for making sure the phone gets answered and that, contrary to L.D.'s assessment, a client MIGHT NOT call back, even if it IS important because we are there to serve them (duh). The result of all this is that I have to have my phone on maximum volume so that Wenchypoo can hear it in her office with the door closed (even though her office is RIGHT NEXT to my desk and I can hear the damned thing when I'm in the copy room which is as far away from the phone as you can get and still be in the office). Therefore, every time the phone rings, it scares the living poop out of me.
-sigh-

Nonsensical Spam

“None whatever,” I said, and the two withdrew to the bar, where I presume the debt was liquidated. This little adventure woke bright hopes

But bye and bye, as she stared ahead into the black chasm with a beating heart, she began to dimly see the form of the horse Jim–his head up in the air, his ears erect and his long legs sprawling in every direction as he tumbled through space
Also, turning her head, she found that she could see the boy beside her, who had until now remained as still and silent as she herself

Vicuodin, Xamnax, Phenxtermeine and much morfe – Samveday Shicpping !

Dorothy sighed and commenced to breathe easier
She began to realize that death was not in store for her, after all, but that she had merely started upon another adventure, which promised to be just as queer and unusual as were those she had before encountered

faktori lifegerm F3 zaqqoom

in my fellow-travellers, who thought they had now come to a country where situations went a- begging.

But I am not so sure that the offer was in good faith. Indeed, I am more than half persuaded it was but

This is an actual bit of spam mail I received. I like it. It's kind of like a story. The only spamy portion is the line that says “vocuodin” etc. It was a link to some website. Otherwise, it's just this nice little bit of prose. I suppose that's how they get past your filters. Clever buggars. Except for the part where they can't spell

tigress sensuous woodard ada

So today I had to stop eating my lunch to go out and buy a big client a diet coke. I realise I need to be a team player and everything, but it still bugs me that it was automatically ME that had to do it.

Only two days until Faye and I make total asses of ourselves in front of two of our idols!

schematic Need something? comprehensible

So far this morning I have:
-Spent two hours adjusting the cubicle walls
-Gone around getting people's lunch orders
-1 task of my actual job

Today has definitely been a Secretary morning. Minus a delightful spanking from James Spader. Damnit.

But the good news is that it's Friday! And even though I have no real plans tonight, and have to spend much of tomorrow cleaning the apartment like mad, the fact that I get to sleep in tomorrow and don't have to come in here is comfort enough.

Does anyone want to do anything tonight?

The other good news is that I dreampt of meeting Simon and Edgar last night. In my dream they invited me and Faye to have a drink with them and discuss zombies. I couldn't have INVENTED a better dream. Thank you, subconscious mind.

Extreme Butthole?

Today's spam title winner was almost “Chat With Vaginas On The Internet!” but then I saw Extreme Butthole? and I knew I had to use it. It's the question mark that is the clincher (pun intended…ew).

I was reading The Black Table and found this article about unusual turn-ons for ladies. A bunch of writers basically wax horny about their favorite unusual turn on from comic book geeks to fundamentalist Christians. Which of course got me thinking…what's my unusual turn on? Well, I think I have my answer and it's going to sound cliche as all get out and not that unusual, but I think it's the length to which this turn-on works that is unusual. So mine is: Funny. If a guy is funny, and I mean REALLY funny, my knees will go weak and I am basically puddy. For examples of the extremity to which this works, here is a short list of comedians who, while certainly not traditionally attractive, melt my proverbial butter something fierce:
David Cross
Zach Galifianakis
Eddie Izzard
Patton Oswalt
Jack Black

Of course there are traditionally hot comedians that are also pretty awesome. But if they weren't funny, I wouldn't think twice about them.

By the way, if you don't go to The Black Table every day, you should. It's one of the best “time waster” sites on the net. And they always have links to those fun little fucked up sites that you never would have come across otherwise.

A man with no legs sitting on the sidewalk with a cup full of change wished me a “Happy Friday” today. Is is wrong of me to think that's a little funny?