Film Threat compiled top ten movie lists from its writers. Here are my picks: 10. Crazy, Stupid, Love. If you haven’t seen this romantic comedy, you may be surprised to see it on this list. Believe me, I’m as surprised as you are that I was actually tickled and moved by this genre-transcendent film. Before [...]
Film Threat Review: Young Adult
I’m not what you would call a Diablo Cody fan, so I was fully prepared to rip on “Young Adult.” Had she written another catchphrase quirkfest, I would have had a field day. I have to give Diablo props (do you mind if I call you Diablo?) because “Young Adult” is about as far from [...]
Film Threat Review: We Bought a Zoo
With one line in “Jerry Maguire” (1996), Cameron Crowe officially switched gears from being an edgy rock n’ roll filmmaker to becoming the Crown Prince of Schmaltz. (It’s gotten so bad, that sometimes I’m not even sure his “good movies” deserve all their praise.) Nonetheless, “You complete me” now sounds like Yeates compared to some [...]
Film Threat Review: The Thing (2011)
When the Powers That Be suggested John Carpenter’s “The Thing (1982)” for the next big remake, there must have been some folks in the room who understood that there is no substitute for the horror masterpiece. Yet, they couldn’t leave well enough alone (have you met Hollywood?). Instead, they decided to disguise their remake as [...]
Film Threat Review: Bots High
In the late 90s, robot death matches became a national sport. Geeky dads and engineering students worked furiously in their garages to build machines, designed to do one thing: destroy other robots. When “Robot Wars” went off the air, our metal friends thought their long nightmare was over. But it turns out it was just [...]
Film Threat Review: The Last Circus
Does anyone still think clowns are funny? I never understood the appeal. A traditional clown is, well, lame. Shakes the Clown is the only one who has ever made me laugh, and that’s more to do with the hilarity of alcoholism than the nature of his vocation. What’s so funny about big shoes (dangerous) or [...]
Film Threat Review: Final Destination 5
Let’s face it. Since the early Aughts, horror villains have been, by and large, drags. Even Founding Fathers of supernatural serial killing, like Freddy and Michael Myers, experienced a 21st century overhaul; a re-invention which sucked all the light-heartedness out of their respective franchises. Meanwhile, the “Saws” and “Hostels” gave us torture porn, which satisfies [...]
Film Threat Review: Crazy, Stupid, Love.
I was all set to hate “Crazy, Stupid, Love.”. For starters, the title is terrible. Not only is it a punctuation nightmare, but it also encapsulates everything that’s annoying about romantic comedies. Love, man. It’s so craaaazy! And stupid! The last thing we need is another movie about Metrosexual Henry Higgins teaching some nerd how [...]
Film Threat Review: Bellflower
Forget those marmot-wielding guys in black from “The Big Lebowski.” Woodrow (Evan Glodell) and Aiden (Tyler Dawson) of “Bellflower” are the denotative Nihilists. Devoid of responsibilities, their days involve imbibing a constant stream of alcohol as they prepare for a “Mad Max” style post-apocalypse and… that’s about it. But their lives get a lot more [...]
FILM THREAT REVIEW: Horrible Bosses
Most everyone has had a horrible boss at one time or another. It’s frustrating while you’re at work and funny when you’re removed from it, so a movie like “Horrible Bosses” should have written itself. That’s certainly why we would go to see a movie called “Horrible Bosses.” Instead, guys who penned such illustrious sitcoms [...]
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